Phil Mickelson and John Daly Might As Well Go Get Wasted in a Pub

Rolling into the British Open Phil Mickelson was optimistic this could be his year. By 10:30 eastern, we knew that wasn't the case. The Hefty Left swung his manboobs from one side of the fairway to the other on his way to a robust 79. At least he didn't waste any time taking himself out of competition. After six holes, Phil was already six over. Including a nice triple bogey on six.

Our patron saint, John Daly, fared no better, shooting an 80. Between them they had a single birdie.

Oh well, at least we know it wasn't Tiger that was keeping Phil from performing well in the British Open. Right now the conditions are nasty and brutish. No one has put up a below par score. Although, amazingly, David Duval finished only three over par.

And hole six, a par 4? The scoring average right now is over 5. No chance I'm getting off that hole without a snowman.

British Open Leaderboard [CBS Sports]</</p>