First of all, this is not the Manny Meltdown that we've all been expecting. Repeat: Meltdown still pending. But it's comical nonetheless. Manny Ramirez, playing in the outfield for the Dodgers vs. the Phillies on Monday, suddenly disappeared between the eighth and ninth innings. No one noticed until someone in the Los Angeles dugout looked up and discovered that left field was vacant. Explanation? Manny was in the bathroom.

This time, there was a plausible explanation — sort of — for Ramirez's brief but conspicuous absence: He thought he had been pulled from the game. Dodgers manager Joe Torre explained that there was some miscommunication between he and Ramirez, acquired from Boston at the July 31 trade deadline. After Ramirez was forced out at the plate in the eighth inning, Torre pointed to him from a distance as a way of congratulating the slugger for his single. But Ramirez thought that meant he was being taken out of the game for defense, so he headed up the tunnel.

"I was in the bathroom," Ramirez said after the Dodgers' 8-6 win. "All the guys said, 'Hey, we play nine in here.' " Of course, Manny's plan seems to be to stay in LA just barely long enough to learn where all the restrooms are. The New York Post said on Saturday that he really wants to be a Yankee, and will go there at the end of the season when he becomes a free agent. And for little more reason than he just wants to piss off the Red Sox. Yeah, that would do it. Out Of Left Field: Manny Ramirez Goes Missing, Dodgers Hold Off Phillies [Hartford Courant] Revenge? Manny Reportedly Wants To Join Yanks [NBCSports]