Blogdome@deaspin.com is not playing around anymore

• Who said it?: "Chief Illiniwek inspired me to be a complete man." This actually explains a lot about a couple of those earlier posts. [Storming The Floor]

• That wasn't supposed to happen: Niagara College scored three shorthanded goals on one penalty kill against Canisius. To be fair, the penalty was for actually killing the other team's goalie. [Two-Line Pass]

• Are they counting Ronnie Woo Woo twice?: News flash: The Chicago Cubs might not be worth $1 billion. Maybe they should have saved some of those home run balls instead of throwing them back. [Walk Off Walk]

• The shot clock makes a great morning alarm: The New Jersey Nets are offering free game tickets to unemployed fans, which is perfect because those folks really need a nice warm place where they can get some sleep. [Hugging Harold Reynolds]

• This changes everything: Holy shit! The Orioles will have slightly different uniforms next year!! The bird has more white in it!!! Try and stop us now, you Blue Jay motherfuckers!!!! [Examiner]

• And his mother's nose: You know, now that I think about it ... Al Horford does have nice eyelashes. [Sports Culture]

Send an email to Dashiell Bennett, the author of this post, at dashiell@deadspin.com.