• Injection molding?: Leggo my Lego baseball players. Where do you stick the needle anyway? [Red Sox Monster]

• It's complicated: Everyone on Facebook hates Bud Selig. So it's just like the real world then. [Home Run Derby]

• The perfect season: Get your official 0-16 Lions merchandise. The 1-15 shirts are already in Zimbabwe. [Fan IQ]

• Second to one: Congratulations, Nationals. You are not the worst organization in baseball. [Half Street Blues]

• Money player: Barack Obama's inauguration is better for the economy than a Super Bowl. Why don't we just do that every day then? [Graney and the Pig]

• It's not racist, it's German: German television presents the Dr. Ahmad Rashad Show. It makes just as much sense as our American version. [NESW Sports]

Send an email to Dashiell Bennett, the author of this post, at dashiell@deadspin.com.