The Ludicrousness Of The Buzzsaw BowlS


So, here's a confession: About 11 years ago, I had a dream about Matt Leinart.

Actually, at the time, I didn't know it was Matt Leinart. I just remember the dream vaguely, wandering through Arizona — a state I wouldn't step foot in for 10 years — as the Arizona Cardinals celebrated winning the Super Bowl. My dreams are always rather dull. I'm envious of those people who see dragons in their dreams, or ninjas, or vast journeys across the space-time continuum. My subconscious is annoyingly linear.

All I remembered from the dream was that a lefthanded quarterback had just led the Cardinals to a championship. Isn't that strange? I told my friend Matt about it, so he can back me up, though at the time he just slapped me for feeling the need to tell a male friend about my dreams.

The funny thing about the dream was that it might as well have been about dragons. The notion of the Cardinals winning the Super Bowl was equally fantastical. In 1998, the Cardinals hadn't made the playoffs since I was seven years old, and that was a strike year, which doesn't count. Since then, I've used the Buzzsaw as a joke. Sure, I've watched all (OK, most) of their games, but it was always with tongue firmly in cheek, like listening to a lot of Meat Loaf and then pretending to be embarrassed about it.

And now here they are. It still doesn't make a lot of sense to me. It doesn't feel right, seeing this happen, and I get a general sense that it doesn't feel right to anybody else either. (The sad thing about Charles Pierce's Slate piece is that I found myself hating him ... and pretty much agreeing with most of what he wrote.) People keep asking me What This Means — mostly because I'm the only Arizona Cardinals fan anyone knows — and I have no idea. It won't make any sense until the game starts Sunday, and probably not even then.

Are the Cardinals going to win Sunday? Theoretically speaking, I'd never want to venture a prediction, lest I jinx my beloved eleven. But at this point, even the most superstitious fan must admit that the world is upside down and without logic. Nothing I could do could make this stranger.

So. Cardinals 23, Steelers 21. And if Kurt Warner gets hurt and Matt Leinart, the lefty, ends up winning on the final drive ... I think I better get my ass to a church.