Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.
•Ole Miss is trying to crack down on students chanting "The South Will Rise Again" at the end of one of their fight songs. With an anemic four touchdowns in SEC play, it makes you wonder when they heard the fight song enough to criticize.
•The Angels shook off a seventh inning Yankees rally with one of their own, and sent the series back to New York, where it's supposed to rain all weekend. At this point, the ALCS will end sometime around game three of the World Series.
•Looks like Bud Selig's watching the playoffs closely, even if the umpires aren't. Baseball will announce that only veteran umps will work the World Series, breaking with the tradition of including one first-timer. I'm not sure this is the answer. You know who has worked a World Series game? Don Denkinger.
•Liverpool's team shop has sold out of beach balls, and they plan to search Man U fans for them before Sunday's match. Actually, I don't even have a comment. That's pretty damn hilarious.
•Frank McCourt has fired his soon-to-be ex-wife from her position as CEO of the Dodgers. Well, shit, if all it takes to get a nice severance package is to sleep with the boss for 30 years...does someone have Nick Denton's number?
•Caroline Wozniacki was up 7-5, 3-0 when bettors around the world began putting money on her opponent. Wozniacki then retired one game away from victory, and the WTA is looking into it. Obviously something's fishy, because people were betting on women's tennis.