These are some of the things that are happening in the nether regions of the sports gossip world. This news is not breaking. It is not exclusive. There are no exclamation points. We did not pay for these photos.

Today In TMZish Sports: Kardashian Denies Engagement Rumor, Bobsled Lady Shows Keister, Rachel Uchitel Turning 35

Kim Kardashian would like everyone to know that, if the Saints win the Super Bowl, she is not getting engaged to Reggie Bush as part of a bet between the couple. No, the deal was, if the Saints win the Super Bowl, she gets engaged to Pierre Thomas. [KK]

Today In TMZish Sports: Kardashian Denies Engagement Rumor, Bobsled Lady Shows Keister, Rachel Uchitel Turning 35

Meet Gillian Cooke, a Brit bobsledder who will most likely be known for the rest of her life as "Bobsled Booty Girl" due to her unfortunate wardrobe malfunction. Comes with super-slomo g-string bobbing action video. [TheSun]

Today In TMZish Sports: Kardashian Denies Engagement Rumor, Bobsled Lady Shows Keister, Rachel Uchitel Turning 35

Original Tiger sidepiece, Rachel Uchitel, is celebrating her 35th birthday party in Palm Beach, Fla. Otherwise known as "the city where your grandparents go to die." [GuestOfAGuest]