There are a handful of down-on-their-luck teams chomping at the bit to sign LeBron James. He'd be the only attraction they'd need to sell tickets. Meanwhile, Cleveland is attempting to break the Guinness World Record for most Snuggies.
You know the Snuggie, right? It's a blanket with sleeves, so you can relax in ease and comfort while you watch the last remaining shreds of your masculinity slip away.
The official record being set is "largest gathering of people wearing fleece blankets." So they don't have to be Snuggies, but the Cavs want to humiliate you anyway.
An anticipated sellout crowd of 20,562 fans will receive a complimentary limited edition Cleveland Cavaliers Snuggie™ blanket courtesy of KeyBank that will be conveniently draped over every seat in the arena. Fans will be asked to wear their Snuggie™ blanket for the first five minutes of the game. In attendance will be Guinness World Records® Adjudicator Danny Girton who will then officially certify the new record. Once the record is achieved, every fan will receive a commemorative magnet certificate that will acknowledge they are a Guinness World Record holder.
And besides, the record's a crock. They want the largest gathering of people wearing fleece blankets? They should visit my Bubbe's community in Boca.