The One Where Ozzie Guillen Threatens To Manage The Cubs

Somewhat-clear-and-coherent quotes from a guy who Tweets in better English than he speaks? Yep, that's why White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen's answer about whether he'd ever coach cross-town bears repeating.

"If (Chairman Jerry Reinsdorf) doesn't want me, yes. My position was I would never sign another place and leave the White Sox for the Cubs because of the respect for Jerry. But if Jerry is leaving me? I'm not leaving them, they are leaving me. Then, I have a choice to make. Everything is out there.

"As soon as you get divorced, you are free to do whatever you want. Yes, I will, not because I say I'm going there, but because they don't want me. Before I say it, I'm not going to leave this place just to punch you guys in the nose. But if you don't want me and someone else wants me, I have to make the decision."

Translation: He's kind of like the pal who'd totally tag your ex after the awkward, Jager-fueled "You wouldn't mind if" conversation.

Sox manager mentions the unthinkable [ Chicago Tribune]