Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.
• (Alleged) Rex and Rob Ryan photo, circa 1983, from Twitter.
• Once, my younger brother and I tried to play an entire game of NBA Live only shooting three-pointers. We made it through one quarter and then stopped because it was the worst idea ever. In Lithuania last weekend, an amateur player named Rolandas Dovydaitis attempted 124 three-pointers in a game and made just 24. But he broke the country's record for most three-pointers attempted in a game, and his team still won, 103-70. "My goal was to score twenty out of a hundred," Dovydaitis told reporters, "but what's most important is that I broke the record." This is using marathon logic for basketball. This is so wrong and still so boring.
• If by chance the Chicago Bears make it to the Super Bowl, then there is the possibility that President Barack Obama and family will attend the game in Dallas. This is nice, but discuss: Is the president ever at all obligated to adjust allegiance towards D.C. teams?
• In the Australian Open yesterday, Rafael Nadal won his 23rd straight Grand Slam match and, as he could become the first man in over 40 years to simultaneously hold all four Grand Slam titles, he is drawing comparisons to Australian great Rod Laver. Meanwhile a very hurt Venus Williams, who gutted out a three-set victory in the second round on Rod Laver Court, is only drawing comparisons to Lady Gaga.
• Tom Brady is getting foot surgery. Belichick has not yet suspended him for the announcement.
• Here's a silly golf headline for anyone who would prefer watching any sport over golf.
Hello & good morning.