Hi. Weird, RIGHT? Anyway, you were warned this was going to happen. So here it is. In all its splashy glory, so follow along with me and I'll attempt to guide you through this ordeal.
How to read this site
You have two ways to scan through a lot of Deadspin stories at once: Flipping or Scrolling.
* If You're A Flipper
You Flippers should use the "next post" button. It's on the left side of the navigation bar at the bottom of the page. Clicking it takes you through the day's stories one at a time. You can even flip through the pages right from your keyboard: Just use the right and left arrow key to page through the day's stories. See? You're Flipping!
* If You're A Scroller
If you'd rather just scroll through headlines, you can use your scroll button or up/down arrow keys to move through the stories in the right-hand column, which are displayed in reverse-chronological order. There is also a "next headlines" button at the bottom of that column, for even quicker scanning.
Those Little Symbols On The Right Up Top
There's a house, a flame, and a magnifying glass. Cute. Click the house if you want to see today's stories. Click the flame for today's most popular stories. Click the glass for search. Good luck with that.
Too many words? Try out this handy video.
BUT MY COMMENTS!
Hey! The site should load faster. That's good, right? Oh, but what about YOUUUUUU, you precious snowflakes of the online underworld.
You're bigger. Your commenter name: Bigger. Your comments: BIGGER. The pics/videos you upload: BIGGGGER. Yeah, you're even bigger stars than you were before. If you can hack it.
Plus, comment forums will also be much more readable and flexible, but the address you'll use to find them has changed. Here's how you get to DUAN!, for all your mindless discussion about shit we don't care about but you do:
Our most popular forums will auto-redirect, but you can access any forum by adding /forum to the end:
And, look, shit's gonna be a little unwieldy and uncomfortable. We'll try to get it together. Just be patient.
In fact, here's another forum
There. Yell about how great this all is.
Again, Be Patient
This is a huge undertaking and will eventually make the site better and more readable. Trust me. I know some of you will hate it and never come back to the home page, but give it some time. You may get used to it after a while. The thing is, this will be a better way to showcase our big stories (Insert your "dong" joke wherever, a-holes).
If you want to resist change, you can always view the dusty old "blog format" here - which gives you something that's a lot like the way the old site looked. And of course you can also read Deadspin via your favorite RSS reader.
THIS SITE IS MESSED UP! WHERE DO I GET HELP?