There's an online charity open through Thursday that will grant two lucky — I mean absurdly wealthy — people an hour-long tennis lesson with John McEnroe at Randall's Island in New York City. The bid is currently at $26,000. The money will go towards saving the earth (literally, I guess?), so we can only be so resentful about this. The tagline, however, is a little misleading and a little disappointing: "Don't miss this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to play tennis with a legend!" First of all, you can't goad someone to "not miss" something that sounds awful and that costs close to $30k, and second of all, there's no promise of being treated to an F-bomb or two or three. It's a rip-off.