Minnesota Twins Disrespect Lesbian Love And God's LawS

Kelsi Culpepper and Taylor Campione, a same-sex couple from Minneapolis, are filing a complaint with the Minnesota Department of Human Rights after a Target Field security guard rebuked them for kissing at a Twins-Angels game last month. City Pages reported:

Culpepper stopped to use the restroom, giving Campione a quick kiss on the lips as she departed.

Immediately after, a middle-aged, mustached security guard in a Twins hat walked toward her, shaking his head.

"I saw you kissing that girl, you can't do that," the security guard said.

"I can kiss whoever I want to," Campione replied.

"Well, we don't play grab ass here," the guard answered.

By the women's account, the guard then told them, "Here in the stadium, we adhere to the Ten Commandments."

Lesbianism is not mentioned in Exodus 20. The game was, however, played on a Friday and lasted until 11:31 p.m., more than two and a half hours after sunset, in violation of the Fourth Commandment. (For people with alternative Sabbaths, the series also included a game that began by daylight on Saturday and another one played on Sunday.) Leading off for the Twins was Denard Span, who once hit his own mother with a foul ball (Fifth Commandment) and who earlier this year said, "Thank God we didn't get no-hit today" (Third).

Among the decorations at Target Field is a 750-pound bronze statue (Second Commandment) of adulterer (Seventh) Kirby Puckett.