Some of the players drafted tonight will become stars, despite our dire predictions, some will be busts, and others will forever be NBA rotation guys, the Lou Williamses of the world, who, try as they might, just aren't quite as good as Jrue Holiday.
But you can make a lot of money doing that, if we can believe Williams' Basketball-Reference page, which says he's made $16 million since 2005, or his new single, "Slow It Down," which repeatedly proclaims, "Goddamn it, I'm rich."
Williams can actually stick to the beat (he's also rapped with Rick Ross crony Meek Mill), and—adjusting for his NBA skills (a career average above 10 points per)—we'd almost call this a success. But then Lou has to go and feature some dude named Dave Patten with a guitar and emo-castoff vocals, and we wind up with a track that sounds like it was excised from Kevin Rudolf's album. Oh, well. At least Lou Williams has the career of not being quite as good as Jrue Holiday to fall back on. Never forget that, especially not tonight, Iman Shumpert.
"Slow It Down" Lou Williams ft. Dave Patten Official Music Video [YouTube, h/t Chris]