Last night, Jay Bilas had to talk for about NBA draftees for about five hours. Even for a person like Jay Bilas, who has probably known five hours of utter silence in all of his 48 years on this earth, five hours is just too much analysis. Faced with this challenge, our brave esquire-commentator had to talk about feet. Good feet. Decent feet. Great feet. Then he had to bring up the wingspans. Then shoulders, and chips on the shoulders. Shoulders have to do with arms, and the arms are connected to the hands, so then there were hands. Good hands. Gigantic hands. Huge hands. Good huge gigantic hands. Tremendous hands! Tremendous heart. What heart.

And finally: meat cleavers.

This is no fault to Bilas. It's his job, and I'd guess the NHL Draft will feature much of the same talk. But I won't be watching the NHL Draft for one reason, and that is because it is the NHL Draft.

*****

Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. Have a weekend.