Presenting Details Culled From The Heroic, Romantic Tale Of How Dan Snyder Courted Mike Shanahan

There's a story in today's Washington Post headlined "Washington Redskins: How Daniel Snyder found his man in Mike Shanahan."

Please go read this marvel of well-timed granting of behind-the-scenes access, but only after reading these amazingly Snyderian phrases and excerpts:

Rock Bottom, and the Need to Escape It:


[B]urgundy-and-gold striped necktie askew, he mouthed an expletive passengers behind him could clearly hear. ... Snyder resembled less of an NFL owner than an exasperated day trader.

Snyder retreated to the pilot's lounge inside the hangar with two of his closest advisers at the time.

The Emergence of a Drunken Path-To-Glory Strategy to Make Him an Offer He Can't Refuse:

While watching NBC's "Sunday Night Football" ... the four men drank glasses of Sassicaia, a bold Tuscan red that is a Snyder favorite ... They added that Snyder eventually graduated to Crown Royal.

Snyder's confidantes still marvel at the impulsive decision, yet they say it encapsulated the way in which they often did business.

The Bombardier BD-700 Global Express XRS corporate jet, which bore the team's helmet on its tail, landed at Centennial Airport outside Denver at about 2 a.m. Mountain time.

Shanahan, As Elegant A Man As His Pursuer:


They drove to Shanahan's sprawling, 35,000-square-foot ranch estate about 10 miles away in Cherry Hills Village, Denver's most exclusive suburb, where one of Snyder's confidantes recalled Shanahan's hospitality. "He said, ‘If you want, I'll put you guys up in the back of the property where you can hear the coyotes howl.'"

The basement of Shanahan's home included a bowling alley and lounge, a poker room, a video-golf room, a racquetball court, a shuffleboard table and four bedrooms. All told, there were six fireplaces, a six-car garage, a pool, waterfall, two bridges and two guesthouses. "You'd never seen anything so big," said one of his guests, who had been to Snyder's French chateau-style estate in Potomac many times.

The 'Yeah Baby, I'll Respect You In The Morning' Woo:

[Snyder] arranged to have his plane pick up Mike and his son, Kyle, in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, where the Shanahan family was spending its annual vacation, and bring them to Los Angeles. Snyder was in Los Angeles to attend the Golden Globe Awards, which the Snyder-owned Dick Clark Productions were contracted to put on.

The Public Deception of Noble Peter King and Other Less Noble NFL Scriveners:

Said a participant in the discussion, "There was a real feeling that everyone in the media was going to say, ‘There goes Dan again, firing a guy after one year.' Most of us felt the best thing to do was stick with Zorn for at least one more season. The P.R. hit was going to be too much, it was decided."

After the tail of the Redskins plane was spotted at the Denver airport, there was immediate speculation about a secret meeting between Snyder and Shanahan. The Redskins put out a story saying the plane was on loan to a private company, and that Snyder was not on it. Local media in Denver and Washington, including The Washington Post, and national media outlets bought the story - and the rumors quickly died down.

"Everybody bought it," one of the participants said. "I still remember [Sports Illustrated's] Peter King calling Vinny on his cellphone, telling Vinny he knows we're in Denver. Vinny says, ‘Peter, we're not in Denver. We're at Redskins Park right now. Go look in the parking lot. All our cars are there.' And I hear Peter on the other end say, ‘Oh yeah, I didn't think you guys would be so [expletive] obvious.' And he hung up."

The Symbolism In Ultimate Consummation, and Release:

As Shanahan and Sandy Montag, his agent, were preparing to leave Snyder's house on the way to his introductory news conference, they saw an assortment of 10 burgundy-and-gold ties arrayed on a table beside the front door. Snyder explained to his new coach that not just any burgundy would do. "There's a Redskin burgundy," Snyder told him, dead serious, "and you gotta make sure it's right."

Washington Redskins: How Daniel Snyder found his man in Mike Shanahan [Washington Post]

Daniel Snyder Finally Dismisses His Dumbass Libel Lawsuit Against The Washington City Paper [Deadspin]