If You Anger JJ Redick, His Brother Will Text Your Ass

If this site has had one founding principle from the beginning, it has been: Do not taunt JJ Redick. He is the ruler of this and many other galaxies, and his will is legendary; he could crush us all with his mind. (He can also use his mind to bend spoons and pop collars.) A Florida woman is learning this the hard way.

Lake Mary, Fla., woman Vanessa Lopez used to "date" Redick — that is to say, she held his head while he cried and read her his poetry — and is now involved in a legal dispute with the Magic "guard." And now she is feeling the wrath of the text message.

Vanessa Lopez said she is afraid for her life because of harassing phone calls and text messages from David Redick. "The victim has received multiple phone calls, threatening in nature, offensive in nature. Pretty much that's all we know so far," Lake Mary police officer Mike Connely said.

We appreciate that Redick is using his brother to harass a former girlfriend; after all, what are brothers for? We're assuming the "legal dispute" involves proper possession of the fishnets.

Woman: J.J. Redick's Brother Threatened Me [Local6]