Jim Harbaugh, king of strange press conferences and second-hand awkwardness, told a gaggle or reporters today that he finds oranges “to be very refreshing.”
“Great thirst quencher,” the University of Michigan head coach said, adding that the “last time I ate an orange was yesterday,” and that he “had one the day before that.”
Immediately I pictured Patrick Bateman reciting Harbaugh’s sermon on citrus, which now that I think about it would make a great shitty Twitter parody account or Tumblr mashup blog.
The 10-2 Wolverines will face the 9-3 Florida State Seminoles tomorrow in the Orange Bowl at the NFL stadium near Miami.
The questions for Harbaugh during his media availability were of course thematically appropriate given the name of the game, but some dumbass reporter decided to take the jovial nature of the presser too far, and asked Harbaugh if he had any thoughts on his players not seeing women in bikinis.
Harbaugh refused to engage with her line of questioning, which concluded his presser.
Q. I want to get your thoughts on this because you have mentioned that the fun is in the football work and the team unity with the guys being down here with the practicing and everything, but your players are a little disappointed they haven’t seen any bikinis. I’d like to get your thoughts on that.
JIM HARBAUGH: I don’t have any thoughts on that.
Q. They would like to see some bikinis before they leave.
JIM HARBAUGH: I don’t know about that. I don’t know anything about that. I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Q. See the beach.
JIM HARBAUGH: I do not know what you’re talking about.
Q. The beach, the bikinis.
JIM HARBAUGH: Yeah. I don’t know anything about that.
Q. Not on the itinerary?
JIM HARBAUGH: Don’t know what you’re talking about.
Note to that reporter: Get a grip. Note to Jim Harbaugh: Oranges are in fact delicious and refreshing.