Locker Page 802 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Not All Hot Takes Are Stupid!
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....

Monty Williams Was There For Ryan Anderson After Girlfriend's Suicide
Sports Illustrated's Chris Ballard has a devastating piece on Pelicans forward Ryan Anderson, who in August 2013 was the one to discover his girlfriend Gia Allemand in her New Orleans home, hanging by her neck from a vacuum-cleaner cord. It is a hard, hard read, but there is goodness here—much of ...

Bruins Go Down 1-0 In First Period; Young Fan Loses All Sense Of Chill
This kid is apparently six years old, and that is an unsettling piece of information given the fact that he sounds like a nine-week-old baby when he gets upset. Anyway, he's mad because he's just watched his beloved Bruins go down 1-0 to the Leafs in the first period. ...

Adam Silver Responds To NBA Union By Writing Random Words
This morning, ESPN The Magazine published an interview with new NBPA executive director Michele Roberts, in which she laid out why NBA owners aren't worth shit to the league, and are functionally the most replaceable bodies. This afternoon, NBA Commissioner Adam Silver issued a statement comprising ...

We Improved A Billy Joel Song By Replacing Him With Jay-Z
We all know that Billy Joel sucks (especially lately), but as SB Nation's Spencer Hall recently noted, there's a portion of nearly every one of his songs that's really great. (You can usually blame Joel's rock-solid rhythm section of Liberty DeVitto and Doug Stegmeyer for that.) ...

J.R. Smith Ends Game With A Very J.R. Smith Shot
The Knicks lost 97-95 to the Orlando Magic last night, and this here was the final play of the game. I'm not going to assume that this isn't the play Derek Fisher drew up, but Carmelo Anthony's frantic calling for the ball would seem to indicate that J.R. pulling up from three was not exactly what...

Kobe And The Lakers Do Dumb Shit; Anthony Davis Dismisses Them
The ridiculous, bad-basketball-playin'-ass Lakers lost again last night, 109-102 in New Orleans, to fall to 1-7. Basically, they performed how you might expect them to on the second night of a road back-to-back: they won the first quarter with some fluky hot shooting, then sagged badly in the middl...

LeBron James's Silly Baby Wouldn't Go To Sleep Last Night
LeBron James's daughter was born in October, and that means LeBron has to be on early morning baby duty when he's at home, just like every other poor schmuck in America who has a baby....

Despicable Us: <em>Foxcatcher</em>, Reviewed
Foxcatcher is a movie about America, but what makes it so compelling is that you don't realize it at first. Directed by Bennett Miller (Capote, Moneyball), the film is too subtle—and, frankly, too strange—to explicitly make some simple, overarching, grandiose statement. And yet, when you replay ...

Taylor Swift And Amar'e Stoudemire Are Buddies(?)
Pop star and New York institution Taylor Swift, who moved to New York in April, is a big fan of the New York Knicks. She is a fan despite the fact that the Knicks are a garbage-ass basketball team, but as Swift told Time.com, her love of them is not entirely without merit:...

NBA Union Chief: Owners Don't Matter And Are Replaceable
Michele Roberts's pitch to NBA players was simple: "My past," she said during her interview, "is littered with the bones of men who were foolish enough to think I was someone they could sleep on." If any NBA owners were still sleeping on the new head of the NBPA, they'd best stay woke from here on i...

This Truly Is The Face Of College Football
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....

Report: Blake Griffin Charged With Misdemeanor Battery
According to TMZ, the Clark County District Attorney has charged Clippers star Blake Griffin with misdemeanor battery for his role in an alleged assault in a Las Vegas night club last month. Griffin is alleged to have gotten mad at cameras flashing in his face while in Tao Nightclub, so he grabbed t...

Deadspin Up All Night: Are You Really Happy?
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Don't go to bed thirsty. ...

Sports Columnist Loses His Mind Over Derrick Rose
Derrick Rose has had an uneven start to the season. He's looked pretty damn good when he's on the court, but he's already missed four games due to a pair of sprained ankles he's been dragging around. On Tuesday, he offered a partial explanation for why he's already missed so many games, and it did n...

All Hail Kobe Bryant And The Lakers, Lords Of Madness
First things first: You don't get to miss more shots than anybody else in NBA history by being bad at basketball. That record would be Larry Hughes's if he didn't, y'know, suck at everything, and in this sense, the all-time missed-shots record is a perverse monument to Kobe Bryant's greatness. He ...

Coors, The Original Trophy Beer (!?), Is Making A Comeback
'Tis the season when lazy bloggers start thinking about how to recycle a year's worth of crap into the awful-yet-beloved "Best Of" lists that allow us to expend as little energy as possible while keeping the internet fed over the holidays. I'll surely do my part with a Best Beers I Drank In 2014 i...

Dirk Nowitzki Says He Invented The "White Version" Of The Dream Shake
With 23 points last night, Dirk Nowitzki moved into ninth place on the NBA all-time scoring list. He passed Rockets legend Hakeem Olajuwon, meaning that Nowitzki has now scored more points in the NBA than any other foreign-born player....

The Troll Who Owns Nets.com Is A 69-Year-Old Woman In Santa Fe
The identity of the person who owns Nets.com has long been sought after, as many people have wanted to know who exactly is using the domain name to troll Mikhail Prokhorov and the Brooklyn Nets. (Go to Nets.com right now and you'll be redirected to an eBay listing for the domain name that features a...