christ Page 57 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Meet Your New Undersized, Scraptastic, Very White New England Sports Cult Hero: Danny Woodhead
Danny Woodhead, the Jets castoff and Rex Ryan-anointed "little fucker," made his Patriots debut yesterday and is already being touted as the economy-sized Wes Welker. Chief among these proponents is Dan Shaughnessy. Of course. Let's look at the best of the worst....
John Salley Story Corner: Contributing To The Delinquency Of Jalen Rose And Chris Webber
Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: buying beer for two-fifths of the Fab Five and telling God to fuck off....
Mike Vick Will Keep Being Best Quarterback In Universe Ever On Sunday, Usually Illogical Coach Declares
Somebody grab a tin bucket and a bag of sawdust because I'm about to puke excitement all over this page. Andy Reid, more stubborn than the most stubborn hanging toenail on the stubbornest toe, has apparently had his head surgically removed from his big red ass and is starting...MIKE VICK THIS SUNDAY...
Look At The Fucking End Of This Trend: Sayonara, Hoopsters
The Hoopsters brought us a lot of enjoyment over the last two months. However, now that summer's over and the New York Times is writing about them—and quoting me—it's time to say goodbye....
John Harbaugh: God Makes Foolish The Wisdom Of The World (Specifically, Vegas Point Spreads)
"Where is the wise man?" John Harbaugh asks his team. "Where is the scholar? Where is the philosopher of this age? Does God not make foolish the wisdom of this world? That's what He did tonight, because we're the Ravens."...
Tuneful, Preppy Version Of "Bitches Ain't Shit" Suggests Bitches May Be Shit, After All
Oh, there's nothing quite like a post-ironic a cappella version of a white man's very ironic cover of a Dr. Dre song done by a group of spunky young tarts....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Kelly Tripucka" Hangs Out With San Antonio Spurs, Is Lead Singer Of Arcade Fire
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: everyone's favorite Polish-American Knicks color commentator Kelly Tripucka....
Ines Sainz's Biggest Defender Once Said Erin Andrews "Encouraged" Her Stalker
Erin Andrews was subjected to a personal violation, and one pundit said she was "playing to the frat house." That's a short step away from "she was asking for it," and that pundit is now leading the charge against reporter harassment....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Shaquille O'Neal" Makes Out With Some Guy At A Party
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: The Diesel, Shaquille O'Neal....
Blackhawks Fans Swing Dancing To That One Annoying Song, Because Why Not
A bunch of Blackhawks fans finally decided to combine their team's insufferable goal-scored anthem with the Lindy Hop because when anyone thinks "middling Scottish rock song," they think "dance celebrating Charles Linbergh." [Puck Daddy]...
For Your Viewing Pleasure: The Worst Mizzou Volleyball Team Rap Ever
The Missouri women's volleyball team's official "Spirit Group," VolleyZou, found an enterprising group of young men with Missouri apparel, a gold cart, a video camera, and lots of gumption and commissioned them to make this, whatever this is....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Toni Kukoc" Drums For Vampire Weekend
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: The Croatian Sensation, Toni Kukoc....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Jason Kidd" Doublefists Dos Equis Cans At A Concert
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: Jason Kidd....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Earl Watson" Shopping For Organic Produce
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: Earl Watson. Earl. Watson....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Isaiah Rider" And "Tyson Chandler" Hang At Rock The Bells
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: Isaiah "Don't Call Me J.R." Rider and Tyson Chandler....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Michael Jordan," Playing Dodgeball In Williamsburg
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: Hipster Jordan. Player: Michael Jordan Team: 1992 U.S. men's national basketball team Ubiquity: Fairly high Scene: Williamsburg Cut Copy show/"Pool Party" Unnecessarily Decimaled Score Ou...
White Duke Player Completes Rare Feat Of Athleticism
Miles and Mason Plumlee, of the Arden Plumlees, took a moment during the Duke basketball game for some fun. Watch as Miles jumps over Mason to throw down a dunk and delight the other tank-top wearing white people in attendance. [The Dagger]...
Deadspin I-Team: Which Reporter Asked For Tim Tebow's Autograph? (UPDATE: Chickster Exoneration Edition)
Fox Sports's Alex Marves tweeted this morning that two members of the Cincinnati media had asked for—and received—Tim Tebow's autograph after last night's Bengals-Broncos preseason tilt. Who are the unprofessional sycophants causing such a media uproar/circle jerk?...
Being Dave Matthews: A Brief History
1985: "Robert Randolph" on the birth certificate, but he'll go by "Randy." That's the original plan. Named after his grandfathers. Then Dad starts having doubts. He's a Robert too—doesn't want his son to be Little Bob or Bobby like he had been. So one day, it just hits my parents. "David Andrew." Da...
Look At These Fucking Hoopsters: Grab Bag
Welcome back to Look At This Fucking Hoopster. I think this latest batch should slake your thirst for the indie bros you love to mock so much. Part One | Part Two | Part Three...