The Dancing With The Stars: Athletes Finale Brought Kimonos, Backflips, And The Loss Of Our Dignity

I’ve always felt that every once in a while it’s good to rank the things you love most. You never know when you’ll be asked to choose between your waffle iron and Stanley Tucci’s character in Big Night, but when you inevitably are, it will be important to have that answer on hand immediately. It’s an easier pill for…

The Penultimate Episode Of The All-Athlete Dancing With The Stars Featured A Lot Of Hats And Not Many Shirts

In the 1994 comedy The Mask, a shy bank clerk named Stanley Ipkiss (played by Jim Carrey) is plagued with the burden and the blessing of discovering an ancient mask containing the spirit of the ancient Norse god, Loki. Under the spell of the mask, Ipkiss, an otherwise meek man who has trouble with women, transforms…

Arike Ogunbowale's Appearance On Dancing With The Stars Will Be A "Personal Growth Experience" To Fit Dumb NCAA Rules

College basketball legend and Notre Dame rising senior Arike Ogunbowale is set to appear on the upcoming season of Dancing With The Stars beginning in just under two weeks. But because Ogunbowale still plays for Notre Dame and is thus considered an NCAA athlete even on summer break, there are at least a dozen…

Hines Ward, NFL's Dirtiest Player And Dancer, Almost Paralyzed His Tango Partner This Week

Hines Ward unintentionally body-slammed his partner, Kym Johnson, during a rehearsal for the show Dancing With The Stars last week. She suffered a sprained vertebrae and returned for what could only have been an "emotional" and "teary" and "inspiring" performance with Ward — and, having survived a full-on hit from…