dea Page 389 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Here's Video Of A Pro Golfer Needing 16 Shots To Conquer A Par-4 Hole
Your morning roundup for April 15, the day after Walter Breuning died of natural causes. He was 114 years and 205 days old....

A Quintessential Night In An American Hospital
Going to the hospital sucks. Aggressively. Hospitals know this, of course. But they have no interest in NOT sucking because if going to the hospital were pleasant and breezy, then everyone would go and the staff would be overloaded and have little or no time to fuck each other in the laundry room. E...

Semin Leads The Capitals To Sweet, Sweaty Extended-Time Victory
Your morning roundup for April 14, the day San Dimas High School football no longer rules in the eyes of the Chinese government....

One Reason Sir Charles Doesn't Like Reporters Is Because They're Idiots
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Chuck wants a vacation in Chicago, so Chuck wants the Bulls to win....

Amazingly, Someone Else Now Claims To Have Invented The "Charge" Chant
On Monday, we brought word that Bobby Kent, a musician from South Florida, claimed to have written the 'da da da da da da... CHARGE!' song that you hear at far too many sporting events....

Dueling Mullets Welcome You To Day One Of The NHL Playoffs
Your morning roundup for April 13, the day Justin Bieber reminded us that the Middle East is still fucked up....

An In-Depth Logistical Exploration Of Animal Rape
Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Find more of Drew's stuff at KSK or on Twitter. Email the Funbag here. Today, we're covering dead bodies, terrifying ear stories, and more....

Sterger On <em>GMA</em>: Never Met Brett Favre, Never Got Paid, Betrayed By Blogger
Your morning roundup for April 12, the day we remembered how Jeff Buckley's death was a more significant event than that guy from Nirvana's to some folks but this won't help that argument....

And When It Was All Over, Rory McIlroy Sought Solace In The Arms Of Vince McMahon's Kid
Your morning roundup for April 11, the day we remembered that Sidney Lumet also directed The Wiz....

A Bunch Of Guys Who Dyed Their Hair Blondish Won The NCAA Hockey Championship Last Night
Your morning roundup for April 10, the day a Virginia elementary school principal assures you the fourth-grade teacher didn't really put black and mixed-race students up for sale....

Even The Top Seed In The Playoffs Isn't Good Enough For This Expressive Bulls Fan
Your morning roundup for April 9, the day it became painfully evident that knowledge gleaned from the Old Testament and YouTube videos do not a professional at-home circumcisionist make....

Cockblocked By Weed Addiction!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Mystery Solved: Courtside Guy At Bulls Games Is Matt Pritzker, And He Is Very, Very Rich
I-Team, you may stand down. So many of you have written in to solve today's mystery about the young fellow who sits courtside at Chicago Bulls games....

I-Team, Do You Know Who This Perpetually Courtside Bulls Fan Is?
Busy day for you guys, we recognize. But tipster Tom has written in with a pressing question:...

College Kid Who Cried "Coach Attacked Me" Apparently Decided To Steal Two Beers From The Phillies
Your morning roundup for April 8, the day the Associated Press union decided to stick it to The Man, with whom it's negotiating a new contract, by not promoting stories on Facebook and Twitter next week. Consequences will never be the same....

Real Men Support The Cleveland Indians By Kissing One Another On Live Television
Your morning roundup for April 7, the day that attempted courtroom eye-gouging became a no-no....

25 Jager Bombs For Only $223.75 Canadian Dollars! An Analysis Of The Epic Receipt From "The #1 Sports Bar In North America."
Here's what I like about this receipt, a full version of which you can view here: You can actually track the progressive drunkeness of whatever pack of Canadian hyenas to which it belongs by their orders. Let's see...they sensibly start with food — nachos, sliders, voodoo shrimp, chicken tenders; an...

The Name Of The Year Bracket Is Out! Taco Monster Says NOM NOM NOM NOM
The Name of the Year Bracket has been released! Holy RexAchilles! That means it's time for Spencer Hall and I to formally go through the bracket in our annual Name of the Year podcast. You can listen here, or click the iTunes link to the show here. Quickly, let me take you through the top four seeds...

Blackhawks Wing Brouwer Whiffs Badly On This Hit, Injures Shoulder
Your morning roundup for April 6, the day Netflix struck an exclusive streaming deal with the Derek Jeter of TV....

Could The 2012 NFL Draft Become A Double Megadraft?!
I had to go an '80s-themed party with my wife on Saturday night. And I have no clue how they do this, but women always seem to have outfits for themed parties ready on their person at all times. "Oh, there's an '80s party? Let me just grab my oversized Esprit T-shirt, leg warmers, and hair crimper! ...