ea Page 2193 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jon Kitna Was Sacked For Your Sins
You just knew that when God finally made his presence known to mankind, it would be to heal a journeyman NFL quarterback's minor head injury. So you Iraqi kids with missing limbs, you're just going to have to wait your turn. Jon Kitna's got to take care of business!...

Woe To The Eagles Fans (And Those Who Sit Near Them)
The pregame festivities might have been more exciting than the actual game, but, nevertheless, we're gonna do our best to keep our distance from Eagles fans for the next couple of days....

Your Chance To See Philly Fans In Prime Time
A night game in Philadelphia always seems, to us, like asking for trouble. Even if fans actually do go to work today, if they leave at 5 p.m., they're gonna have enough time to really mess some matters up. Or, you know, paint their bodies....

Leave Bill Belichick Alone!
This guy must have watched the Crazy Britney Fan video at least fifty times to achieve this degree of nuance, and for that I salute him. He also gets a couple points for the Brady jersey. Not sure about the touque, though. I managed not to laugh out loud until near the end, when he slipped in one fi...

Maj's Parlay O' The Week
Amateur athletics and gambling go together like campfires and hallucinogenic mushrooms. Which is why I asked the Selleck to my Guttenberg, Unsilent Majority, to share some more of his valuable college football gambling wisdom with us today. Dumb disclaimer: the following "wisdom" could be wrong. The...

Bill Belichick Is Always Watching
• Bitch, Isiah Thomas has a lot to say. • Shaq's bus sends some mixed messages. • What a huge day at RFK Stadium. • Jason Elam's kick was amazing. • The Smorgasbord returns! • Obey Belichick. • Gilbert Arenas knows how to deal with a lady. • Poor Greg Oden. • We tell you with whom to have sex. • Ski...

It Mated Us. We Hadn't Even Been Properly Introduced.
It wants to ... turn us into something else. That's not too terrible is it? Most people would give anything to be turned into something else....


About Last Night ...
What you missed while editing special effects into your wedding video ... • MLB: Dodgers make their portly, drunken run at the NL wild card. • Golf: Tim Clark proves that practice is overrated. • College football: Hope you've got Steve Slaton in your NCAA fantasy pool. West Virginia 31, Maryland 14....

Steely McBeam Gets Him Some Lady Lovin'
What is it about the Pittsburgh Steelers that women find so attractive? Is it The Dreamboat that is Ben Roethlisberger? The prospect of folding and laundering extra towels? The memory of this? The answers are shrouded in mystery. But the fact is that they just do: According to a recent marketing sur...

Off To Seattle We Go ...
In about two hours, we'll be hopping on a plane — JetBlue; we love the JetBlue — for the sunny peninsula of Seattle, Washington. (Note: Seattle is neither sunny nor a peninsula.) We've got quite a weekend schedule in Seattle, thanks largely to the fine folks at KJR 950, which has even set up the wo...

Does Anyone On Earth Own A Fathead?
We ask with genuine curiosity: Who in the world puts a Fathead on their wall? What started out as an odd marketing campaign with Ben Roethlisberger screaming at us to "get a Fathead," or "be a Fathead," or whatever, has clearly grown into ... well, a larger marketing campaign. We've never quite seen...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you arrive a day late for the party ... • WNBA: Finals, Game 3: Detroit at Phoenix. Hey, throw some of them free tickets my way, gals. [ESPN2] • MLB: Yankees at Blue Jays. Begin dome-closing sequence ... now. [Yes Network] • Soccer: Euro 2008 qualifying, England vs. Israel. Dropping...

Inside The Yankee Stadium Proposal Prank
Click to view Last week, the kids at College Humor pulled off what we'd have to consider a prank of epic proportions; one guy put a fake marriage proposal on the big screen at Yankee Stadium as his friend, the object of the prank, sat agape with his girlfriend, who, amazingly, said "yes" before he ...

September 11: Perspectives From Bayless, Mariotti And Paige
It's the six-year anniversary of September 11 today, and we're not gonna make a huge thing about it, because everyone should grieve / remember in their own personal way. To commemorate the occasion, though, we thought it might be fun to step in the way back machine and see how three of our great pol...

Do Not Even THINK About An NFL Player Dogfighting
Our pal AJ Daulerio, reporting for Philadelphia magazine, heard a rumor about a potential dogfighting case involving members of the hometown Eagles. Like any diligent reporter, he made a few calls, including one to the Eagles' office, and he found nothing, and reporting nothing. But that wasn't the ...

Introducing The SSW
For years — OK, a couple of days — Slate writer Robert Weintraub has been tinkering with a concept called The SSW. He might have finally mastered it. This morning, we allow him to introduce his invention to the planet....

Buzzsaw-49ers MNF Live Blog
All right, we'll tell you right now: This is a terrible idea. Not only have we been up since 4:15 this morning, but we're also in the odd position of attempting to type non-stop, for three hours, about the season opener of a team for which we have an emotional connection. And we're going to do it ...

Shaq Has Many Idols
This weekend, during Tragedy Bowl I, ESPN's cameras found Shaquille O'Neal, a 2000 graduate of LSU, up in a luxury box. This means he needed transport to the game. This is what he rode....

Naked Canadians Sprinting
Apparently, a radio station in Canada was encouraging fans to break the all-time streaking record, which is something the security force for the Stampeders just loved to hear. We count four in this video, though, frankly, there are really just three; that wuss who just ran around shirtless absolutel...