ea Page 2236 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

No, YOU'RE Don Francisco's Sister!
Isn't all mankind ultimately executed for a crime it never committed? The difference is that all men go eventually, but we go at six o'clock tomorrow morning. We were supposed to go at five o'clock, but we have a smart lawyer. Got leniency....

Uh, Jack, You Missed A Spot. A Big Spot
Sorry, Mr. Orton: There's a new neck beard champion. This photo, swiped by 55 Problems, shows Jack Nicholson with the strangest neck beard we've ever seen. Uh, you'll fix that by Oscar night, right Jack?...

Sean Salisbury Gets His Alan Greenspan On
We don't mean to be snobs here, but, if this video is to be believed, there are human beings on the planet who are listening to Sean Salisbury talk about his investment strategies....

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Ozzie Guillen Vs. Stephen A. Smith
Just two more first-round matchups left until the Elite Eight, and we've got a potential barnburner here today. (Does anyone other than Musberger use "barnburner" anymore? We like the term.)...

Flush With Two-Ply Dreams Of Greatness
The Bakersfield Condors are a minor league hockey franchise in California, whose team motto is Soaring to New Heights. And never will that be more in evidence than on Friday during Toilet Paper Roll Giveaway Night, as the Condors take on the Fresno Falcons....

You Cannot Hide From Lance Armstrong
Far be it from us to insinuate that Lance Armstrong is still in the heads of the French cycling establishment, but now they're accusing him of breaking into their email....

Welcome To The Romo Bandwagon Express, With No Stops Until Jan. 20
With Steve Silverman's love note to Tony Romo on MSNBC this morning, let the worship of the Dallas quarterback officially begin. Not that it started with Silverman by any means — Madden has been giving Romo verbal backrubs for more than a month now. But we're just wondering if America is ready for t...

Sometimes, We Just Learn A Bit Too Much
We know, we're soulless ironists, not connected to the problems of the everyday world, except to mock them. We accept your scorn, and we probably deserve it....

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Jay Mariotti Vs. Darren Daulton
After nearly a week off, the Deadspin SHOTY Tournament kicks back up today — just three more first-round matchups left — with a guy who seemingly shows up every week around these parts, if just to make himself more famous, against a former Philadelphia hero who has only made Deadspin once, but in a ...

The Snow Is Finally Here, And The Playoffs Aren't Far Behind
For all the talk of Brett Favre and Matt Hasselbeck and a dogged night from Shaun Alexander, the main impression we took from last night's MNF Seahawks' win over the Packers was: SNOW! Screw Thanksgiving: We know the holidays are really upon us when it's snowing real hard and people are falling over...

Your Last Night Of MNF Brett Favre Backrubbing
Of all the tired Brett Favre storylines out there, our least favorite is the "He's playing against Mike Holmgren again!" theme. Yes, yes, they won a Super Bowl together; we're not sure this makes this all that necessarily compelling. Besides, that would require remembering a time when Brett Favre we...

Welcome To Deadspin Widescreen
As some of you might have noticed, the design looks a wee bit different around here today; we're doing some tweaking, some minor "redesigning," if you will, and we think it looks quite nice....

In Case You Were Wondering What Freddie Mitchell Has Been Up To Lately
We never tire of making fun of the various post-"retirement" exploits of former Philadelphia Eagles wide receiver Freddie Mitchell, but a reader from Indiana tops them all with a story (and picture) he sent in over the weekend. Here's the tale:...

NFL Roundup: Drew Brees' Mom Might Not Like Him, But Everybody Else Does
News And Notes From Week 12 In The NFL......

Sunday Night Football: Colts vs. Eagles
Flex scheduling was supposed to prevent things like this. NFL rules now allow NBC to select their Sunday night games a couple of weeks in advance to avoid late season matchups like Tennessee vs. Minnesota or something. And even with the new policy, we still end up with Jeff Garcia in prime time. But...

Week In Deadspin: See Ya, Larry
• Tony Banks' wife likes to keep him happy. • Gilbert Arenas is a damned genius. • Look out Bobby Bowden: Here comes the eBay! • The Cubs, they spent a lot of money. • Warren Sapp ... poisoned! • David Wright and Jose Reyes, LOOKING HOT! • Bill Simmons made a fantasy basketball trade with Dean Cai...

We're Easy
Y'all take it easy now. This isn't Dallas, it's Nashville! They can't do this to us here in Nashville! Let's show them what we're made of. Come on everybody, sing! Somebody, sing!...

Happy Thanksgiving, Bird Brains
Well, we figure most of you have skipped out of the office for the long weekend, so we figured we might as well do the same; it's off for Thanksgiving for us now. We were considering doing one of those "We're Thankful For ..." stories, that pointed out all the Crazy and Wacky things in the world of ...

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Farney
All right, after some wild voting irregularities yesterday — remember: The Deadspin way is not to raise too much issue with people cheering on their favorites in a poll on a silly blog — we have what we'd think would be a blowout today. But you never know: Someday a No. 16 WILL beat a No. 1. Probabl...

Five Tiny Tidbits On: The SEC West
Thought we were done previewing things? How could you think that, with your NCAA Basketball Tournament office pool a mere four months away? You've got to start studying now if you want to tame the royal trouser predator. So who's with me? Let's Gooo! Send tips on your favorite team to tips@deadspin....