f Page 1676 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
NFL Network's Heath Evans Calls For Roger Goodell To Blackball Johnny Manziel
Professional moron Heath Evans spoke on the NFL-owned NFL Network today and called on league commissioner Roger Goodell to throw out the collective bargaining agreement and ban teams from signing troubled quarterback Johnny Manziel....
FIU Player Gives Opponent Two Swift Kicks To The Dong
FIU lost a second-round Conference USA tournament game to UTEP last night, but not before junior forward Adrian Diaz did some dick-kicking....
Fox Invades Golf Course, Steals A Dude's Wallet
Here’s a good thing to keep in mind if you ever find yourself fawning over a wild animal....
Let's Make Some Fuckin' Pasta
A few weeks ago, I made some fuckin’ pasta. The pasta I made is right there in the image above. Isn’t it gorgeous?...
Rick Carlisle Calls Out Referee For Baiting Deron Williams Into A Technical Foul
Mavericks point guard Deron Williams was given a technical foul by referee David Jones during last night’s game against the Pistons. According to Mavs head coach Rick Carlisle, the tech was only called because Jones went out of his way to bait Williams....
Tom Brady's New Contract Is Great For Everyone
It’s a biennial NFL tradition: Tom Brady reworks his contract with the Patriots to get more money up front in exchange for kicking the salary cap can down the road. Brady’s latest two-year extension was announced last month, but we now have the numbers....
The Chiefs Will Fight The NFL On Tampering Penalties
The Kansas City Chiefs have been hit by the NFL with a raft of penalties for illegally tampering with Jeremy Maclin during 2015's “legal tampering” period, and, frankly, it’s pretty insane. The penalties are harsher than any previously imposed, and the violation was one that undoubtedly happens doze...
Raw Milk Is For Idiots
Some very stupid lawmakers in West Virginia are sick, presumably with the shits. They lifted the state’s ban on raw, unpasteurized milk a few weeks ago, then drank some raw, unpasteurized milk to celebrate, and, well, they are feeling bad lately. This seems an opportune moment to point out that actu...
When Is It Acceptable To Take The Elevator?
Let’s say that you live in a place where you’ve got to walk a mile or so, then take a train, and climb up and down a maze of stairs in the stations that house those trains, in order to get to work every day. Let’s say that you work on the third floor of an office building that has 18 occupied floors...
Report: Texans Sign Brock Osweiler
The Houston Texans have reportedly agreed to a deal with quarterback Brock Osweiler. Rand Getlin of NFL Network broke the news first....
ESPN Falls For Fake Jay Glazer Tweet About Olivier Vernon Signing With The Jaguars
ESPN’s NFL Live bit hard on a fake tweet about defensive end Olivier Vernon signing with the Jacksonville Jaguars today. Trey Wingo broke the “news” from “Fox Sports,” threw it to Adam Schefter for details (on a signing that didn’t occur), and opened it up to the panel. There’s something perfect abo...
When Will The Browns Cut Johnny Manziel?
The Cleveland Browns are completely done with Johnny Manziel; Hue Jackson’s comments at the combine are as close to confirmation as anyone needs. But while every other team was cutting their dead weight last week, the Browns aren’t going to do anything until 4 p.m. EST today at the earliest—and poss...
Weightlifting Supplements Are Terrible, But I Love Them Anyway
Most days, if I remember, I’ll have a multivitamin with my breakfast, along with two small gelcaps with 1,000 international units of vitamin D (desk monkey, you know) and a probiotic. If I forget, I’ll probably feel no better or worse by midday. If I’m getting sick, I’ll suck on a zinc lozenge and p...
Report: The Broncos Would Go After Colin Kaepernick If They Lose Brock Osweiler
There hasn’t been a defending Super Bowl champion with a quarterback question this glaring since, well, the last time the Broncos won and their QB retired. (Brian Griese did not turn out to be the answer.) But Denver enters free agency with Brock Osweiler unsigned and reportedly very interested in h...
Irritable Bearded Men Fight At Blue Jackets Game
Two clowns at Tuesday’s Red Wings-Blue Jackets game argued and threw punches at each other before security intervened. It’s unclear what prompted the brawl, but it was most likely very important....
Chris Cooley Has A Whole Bunch Of Thoughts On RGIII
Four years ago today, Washington agreed to send three first-round picks and a second-rounder to St. Louis for the right to move up to draft Robert Griffin III. Today, Griffin is a free agent, and the man the Skins selected on the third day of that draft is their QB and set to make $20 million....
Scottish Manager Celebrates Goal By Beating Up His Own Player
Here’s Inverness CT manager John Hughes, demonstrating on the jawbone and ribcage of Liam Polworth, the thin line between cheerful exuberance and adrenaline-drenched rage:...
Dana White Says Holly Holm Fucked Up By Not Waiting For Ronda Rousey Rematch
Holly Holm was never more valuable as a fighter than after her shock win over Ronda Rousey in November, and there would have been no more valuable fight in the history of women’s UFC than a rematch between the two. Both of those things are out the window now, after Holm was choked out by Miesha Tate...
Eagles-Dolphins Trade Could Be Off Because Of Byron Maxwell's Shoulder
The NFL’s two-day “legal tampering period,” on top of having a silly name, is a silly idea. It’s designed for teams to talk to agents before free agency officially opens, but they’re not supposed to agree to deals, not even in principle. They always do, of course—that’s why those deals are officiall...