f Page 1693 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
It Looks Like The 49ers Kicked Out The Girl Scouts For A Beyoncé Concert
Earlier this week, the San Francisco 49ers cancelled a planned sleepover at Levi’s Stadium for the top cookie sellers from Girl Scout troops around Northern California. As a reward for selling the most cookies, the scouts were going to spend the night of May 14 eating pizza and watching a movie on t...
Here's Jonathan Stewart's Superman TD In High-Res
The Panthers clawed back to within three points of the Broncos with this second quarter dive over the lines by Jonathan Stewart. With the hundreds of photographers in the stadium keyed up for a goal line touchdown, we got a ton of cool angles of Stewart’s touchdown. ...
Chang-Chang, Changity-Chang Shoo-Bop
Jonathan Stewart was born to hand jive. Broncos 10, Panthers 7....
OK
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Why Is The NFL Giving More Super Bowl Ad Time To Its Favorite Sham Domestic-Violence Group?
I took the No More pledge last year. What do I have to show for it? I’m now very aware of when #NOMOREexcuses Law & Order: Special Victims Unit marathons are about to air, but that’s about it. I don’t know much more about domestic violence or sexual assault. I haven’t discovered new organizations wo...
The Only Super Bowl Preview You Need Is This Taiwanese Animation
The Super Bowl is on today at some time or another, and if you aren’t gonna check out Drill My Gay Stepson!, American football is an okay substitute I suppose....
World's Best Cycling Team Disinvited From Tour Of Qatar Because They Take Too Long To Change
Riders from Etixx-Quickstep have won eight of the past 10 Tours of Qatar. The race’s crosswinds and wide roads are perfect for the classics-focused squad, and they’ve cleaned up. But they won’t be going this year, because the race’s owners are unhappy with their costume changes....
Here Are The Porn Movies You Could Be Watching Instead Of The Super Bowl
Most networks don’t even bother attempting to program against the Super Bowl. But every channel has to air something, including your local cable provider’s porn channels. Here are the titles of porn movies airing on Time Warner Cable opposite the Super Bowl, according to today’s TV Guide:...
Report: Marshawn Lynch Plans To Retire
Marshawn Lynch has teased his possible retirement for a few seasons now. After last year, he was reportedly considering retiring, but then he changed his mind and signed a two-year deal. Now, he’s apparently told people he’s retiring, per Adam Schefter....
I Want To Kiss This Gorgeous Futsal Goal Right On The Mouth
Ricardinho is a Portuguese futsal player and also apparently a real actual wizard. He scored this wondergoal on Serbia at the European Championships yesterday, and oh man is it pretty....
Terrell Owens Didn't Make The Hall Of Fame, Which Is Bullshit
Terrell Owens is second all-time in receiving yards, sixth in catches, and third all-time in receiving touchdowns, yet was not elected to the Hall Of Fame this year, in his first year of eligibility. Owens announced the news this evening....
**BONK**
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Houston Rockets Decide As One To Just Not Play Defense
The Rockets’ pick-and-roll defense is apparently, uh, no pick-and-roll defense? At least Corey Brewer got in there and did a swipe. This isn’t as bad as that one time James Harden just sort of froze against the Knicks, but geez....
The Case For The Broncos
Just about everyone thinks the Carolina Panthers will win Super Bowl 50. ESPN asked 70 staffers for their predictions and 53 of them chose the Panthers. Eight SI writers out of 10 picked Carolina too. The Panthers opened as 3.5 point favorites and so many people bet on them, that the line swelled to...
Goofball Dancing Behind Brian Baldinger Is The Real Super Bowl MVP
NFL Network’s hours upon days upon weeks of Super Bowl coverage have been brain-choking, though we can’t deny that the meaningless words being spewed from the channel’s personalities are drawing viewers. But, really, how much more is there to be said about tomorrow’s game? Thankfully, this young cha...
What Are You Cooking For The Super Bowl?
As much as we recommend it, we know that not everyone will be making a pepperoni cheese loaf monstrosity. For one, ingesting that much dairy can only be a recipe for disaster. ...
Joe Montana Says Football Ruined His Body
At this point, everyone has heard all those terrifying stories about retired football players’ brains falling apart on them. But years and years of hits add up, and the impacts can stay with you forever. Joe Montana talked to USA Today about what football did to him and it sounds awfully bleak:...
Radio Dummy Gets BOFA'd For His Dumb Tweets About The Dunk Contest
Get a load of Matt Steinmetz, a Bay Area radio guy, spewing some colossally dumb shit onto his Twitter feed about Andre Drummond, dunking, free throws, and Playing The Game The Right Way....