f Page 3182 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jeremy Mayfield's NASCAR Suit Dismissed Due To Lack Of Realism
Racing fans may be wondering what's up with their favorite tweaked out NASCAR family, but sadly the trial of the century between Jeremy Mayfield and his drug-testing bosses has been called off due to crazy things like "the law."...

And Your No. 1 NBA Draft Pick Goes To ... The Wizards
Sorry, John Wall. Washington leapfrogs four teams to get the No. 1 slot. My vague, unverifiable prediction: The Nets will be glad for this in the long run, I think....

What A PR Guy Sounds Like When He's Returning Calls About Delonte West Banging LeBron's Mom
Remember all those absurd rumors about LeBron's mother Gloria and oft-benched teammate Delonte West knockin' boots? Well, I called the Cavs and left a fairly detailed message, asking for comment. And the Cavs called back....

Watch The 1972 NBA One-On-One Championship, In All Its Glorious Weirdness
In 1972, the NBA had a one-on-one tournament for $15,000. They played by twos, to 20, win by four. There was a "take-it-out" line that was not the three-point line. The NBA: Where weird but sorta awesome used to happen....

Greatest Football Chants Of The Season REVEALED
Football fans love a good chant, and this season has heard plenty of them....

Shouldn’t All Priests Be Castrated?
It's Tuesday. Let's look in the funbag and see what's inside. Oooh! Big League Chew! Man, do I love Big League Chew. It's like tobacco, but for children! Do I chew the entire pack all at once? FUCK AND YES, I do. Oh, and there are some letters in here. Let's read them....

Canadian HGH Doc Charged, Inevitable NFL Leaks Ahead
Anthony Galea was charged today in connection with smuggling HGH into the country, and three star witnesses are unnamed NFL players. When their names invariably come out, will the witch hunt begin?...

Ron Mexico Cigars — Somehow Making 50-Cent Cigars Less Classy
Someone in the Dominican Republic knows what they're doing, judging by that Heisman pose on the label. Makes me wonder if they're actually intended to hold tobacco. But, you know, don't share them. Herpes sores and such. [Cigars International]...

What To Do With Hanley Ramirez?
Ramirez embarrassed his team by jogging after a ball. His manager returned the favor, benching him immediately thereafter. Ramirez spouted off to the press about it. We've got a problem here that can't be fixed by the usual news cycle....

ESPN And FarmVille Joining Forces To Annoy The Absolute Piss Out Of Everyone Everywhere
Oh, look. Sports Business Journal's Eric Fisher found a Horrifyingly Large Turd on his farm to share with his friends! "One of new ESPN social media games will be ESPNUville, their take on ultrapopular FarmVille....." [@EricFisherSBJ]...

Do You Have An Internship Horror Story? We Want To Hear It
Oh, the joys of being an intern: Calling in lunch orders, mind-numbing filing, licking envelope after envelope. Summer is coming, so chances are some of you readers are embarking on prestigious internships to learn the tricks of your chosen trade....

Two Very Different Approaches To Honoring Your Contract
Houston's Andre Johnson wants to re-negotiate his seven-year contract that has five years remaining on it. Oguchi Onyewu wants to play for AC Milan so badly, he'll do it for free. Who is the dummy and who is the hero?...

Obvious, Yet Cringe-Inducing Hockey Article Of The Week
The Globe and Mail's James Mirtle wrote a piece this weekend on the potentially catastrophic effects of mouth injuries in the NHL and the "walk-it-off" culture surrounding them. Who's ready to grimace and suck their teeth in fear?...

Wolpfack Typo Makes For Efic Pail
NC State issued their baseball media guide last week — then quickly took it down. Study it long enough, and you'll see why. Dyslexics of Raleigh...untie! [StateFansNation]...

Softball Conference Champs Just Want To Dance It Out (WINNER'S UPDATE)
Fresh off winning an Atlantic Sun conference championship, the Lipscomb Lady Bisons debuted a coordinated dance routine. Unfortunately, it brought them neither the replenishing rains that would ensure a bountiful harvest nor a Women's College World Series title....

Columnist Who Likened Flyers To Nazis Is Surprised When Philly Fans Slash His Tires
Since the smart money has the Stanley Cup going West, at least the Habs and Flyers can battle it out for the title of North America's most property destructin-est fanbase. Round one goes to Philly....

Paraguayan Soccer Player Rockets In 45-Yard Free Kick
For anyone not satiated by the Lionel Messi goalapalooza from earlier, here is another goal video from a funnily named player in a sports league in a country with which you're vaguely familiar. Somebody buy that man a Baviera. [Goal.com]...

Sharks GM Has Competitively Attractive Daughter
San Jose Sharks GM Doug Wilson's daughter, the absurdly named Lacey, competed in last night's Miss USA competition. So that's why the Sharks were so on edge during Game 1 and couldn't solve the Rubik's Cube that is Chicago goalie Antti Niemi....

Messi Scores 47 Goals…And Here’s ALL Of Them!
And so Lionel Messi equaled a scoring record — held also by hamster-faced Ronaldo — by helping himself to another couple in yesterday's match. The internet beavers have since been working away, and above is some proof of their toil....

Meet Tyler Lewis: The No-Look-Passing, Ankle-Breaking Teenager
Here's video of a high school sophomore who, since he's white, will be compared endlessly to Steve Nash. While not Nash-level yet, he has a lot going for him: great floor-vision, superior play-making skills, and not being Guerdwich Montimere. [Hoops Doctors, ONEentertainmentHOOPS.com]...