f Page 3201 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Look At All The Pretty Pictures: The iPad-Friendly Deadspin
Hello Saturday afternoon lurkers. If you go to beta.deadspin.com (and beta.gizmodo.com) you'll get a glimpse into the future. Express your feelings in the comments, please. Your feedback is encouraged. Even if it's profane....

Little Girl Cries Over Tweety Carter's Departure From Baylor. We've All Been There.
Via reader Ben comes this video of a 5-year-old girl who's incredibly, adorably distraught over the Baylor guard's approaching graduation. It is, I believe, the distilled essence of every Rivals.com message board in existence. [YouTube; somewhat related]...

Redskins Have The Strangest Backfield Ever
Washington signs Willie Parker, planning to run the exclusive three-RB formation, in which he, Portis and Johnson line up, only to watch Jason Campbell doink the ball into the turf four yards from the line of scrimmage. [AP]...

Time For A Lady To Have Her Say. GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

The NCAA Is Destroying The Men's Basketball Tournament
The 2010 men's championship has been one the most exciting and competitive basketball tournaments ever. I hope you enjoyed it, because it will be the last time. The NCAA is determined to ruin the best thing it ever created....

A Jewish Fantasy Baseball Draft Kicked Off By A Constipated Young Lady
Do you remember these gals? If not, you should get to know them better. Sam and Susannah and the rest of Middlebrow media will be helping us out from time to time. Enjoy their Passover-friendly fantasy baseball draft. (Possibly NSFW)...

Everyone In Rochester Is Psyched For The Frozen Four
Yes, even the roadkill. Rochester Institute of Technology's surprise appearance in the NCAA hockey semifinals has Tiger Fever sweeping through campus, and rabies sweeping through the central nervous system of whoever set this up. [via this kid's Facebook]...

Here's A Video Of A Basketball-Playing Dog That You Will Watch All Day
This pup has the fundamentals and requisite pizazz to dominate a rec league and galvanize a small town, something that has not been seen since the Air Bud franchise stormed into theaters and stole our hearts and our $9.95. [YouTube]...

Last Night's Winner: John Feinstein
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like sportswriter John Feinstein, who badgered a hapless NCAA VP yesterday over tournament expansion and thereby became a hero to anti-expansionists for all the wrong reasons....

Annoying Flying Fish Slaps Woman In The Face
An influx of Asian carp to the Illinois River has given rise to extreme aerial bowfishing, a niche sport combining speedboats with archery. This is what happens when the fish fight back with some extreme aerial moves of their own....

Shaun Rogers Almost Brings Loaded Gun Onto An Airplane
The Cleveland tackle was arrested at Hopkins International Airport today after he "forgot" that he had a loaded gun in his bag. Even worse, his shampoo bottle was well over four ounces. [Plain-Dealer/WOIO]...

Letter From Durham: Why You Shouldn't Hate Duke, And Why You Probably Will Anyway
The first game of Duke's season, against UNC-Greensboro on Nov. 13, was broadcast only on Fox Sports South, which meant that my friends up North had to wait another few days to get their initial glimpse of this year's team....

Gordie Howe Once Checked The Shit Out Of An 8-Year-Old
And it just happened to be William Clay Ford Jr. Call it the Gordie Howe grand slam - a goal, an assist, a fight, and one flattened prepubescent car dynasty scion. [NY Times]...

And Nike Officially Ruins April Fool's Day
CBSSports.com and ESPN.com are both running some amazing stories today. Every single one manages to discuss how the fantastic athletic feats were pulled off thanks to Nike Air shoes. We've come a long way from Sidd Finch's single hiking boot....

The Steve Phillips Redemption Timeline
AOL Fanhouse hired Steve Philips as their new baseball analyst, just 161 days after the world learned he had an affair with an ESPN underling. Is that some kind of record for morphing from sexual disgrace to professional respectability?...

In Which We Declare A Fatwa On All Online April Fooling
It's April Fool's Day today, and we've now reached the point where April Fool's has officially become a web nuisance. "Big news everyone! From now on the funbag will be written by Robert Weintraub!" Yes, hardy fucking har. Everyone realizes it's April Fool's Day right around 9:02AM these days. The r...

PETA Capitalizes On Clemens's Failure To Launch
PETA suggests that Roger Clemens's rumored performance issues are due to his carnivorous diet. Wonder if the grand jury will buy that one. [PETA via copyranter]...

"Dead" Wrestler Of The Week: The Ultimate Warrior
Every week, the Masked Man, Deadspin's pro wrestling correspondent, honors the sport's fallen and examines their legacies — famous and obscure alike. Today: The Ultimate Warrior, who according to rumor died in 1991. This is an investigation into that "death." [Update, April 9, 2014: He's dead, accor...

Kevin Garnett: "We Were Playing Michael Fucking Jordan"
A live mic and a player upset with the officiating always make for an interesting combo. Kevin Garnett did not disappoint:...

Tiger Stands To Earn Someone Some Cash If He Keeps Up Infidelity
British bookmakers have set odds on whether Woods will "kiss an anonymous blonde" before stepping up to the first tee at Augusta. Photo unrelated, we hope. [AP]...