f Page 3203 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

West Virginia Players Celebrate Kentucky Win, Rip Off Dance Moves
Da'Sean Butler and John Flowers, no strangers to the art of dance, celebrated West Virginia's win by doing the John Wall Dance. Alert the Lexington Intellectual Property Society of this egregious clownin' immediately! [Via The Big Lead]...

Santonio Holmes Shows Steeler Solidarity, Gets Sued By Woman He Met In Nightclub
A woman in Florida has filed a civil suit against Holmes after an alleged nightclub incident, in which she claims he hit her in the eye with his....oh, thank goodness it was just a glass. [Courthouse News/ESPN]...

Tom Izzo Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the new unanimous choice for greatest coach in the history of world history. Improbably, that guy works for Michigan State....

Who Are Those Handsome Devils?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Hanley Ramirez's Sugar Daddy Keeps Him In Bling
Tacky, tacky, tacky. But the pendant celebrating Ramirez's batting average title isn't as bad as it could be, since he didn't buy it himself. No, it's a gift from an older gentleman that likes to see he's taken care of....

Augusta's Chauvinism Enabled Tiger, Says Masters Rabble Rouser
Tiger Woods's return at the Masters is fitting, because it's the mentality at that all-male club that drove him to cheat on his wife with an endless parade of floozies. That's Martha Burk's take on it, anyway....

AHL Coach Hulks Out On Referee
This is the Abbotsford Heat's Jim Playfair, concerned with a lack of fair play. The casualties: two sticks, and perhaps a pair of jacket buttons....

There's No Going Back For Urban Meyer
Yesterday, Meyer apologized to the reporter who he confronted on Wednesday. Both say the meeting was productive and they're ready to move on. So it's all in the past now, right? Not so fast....

Go Read This Story About The Torment Of Sportswriter Mike Penner As Soon As Possible
Christopher Goffard of the LA Times appears to have pulled together the most honest account of the final years of former sportswriter Mike Penner's haunted life were like when he struggled to find his identity as Christine Daniels....

Steve Nash And Robin Lopez Star In <em>Balls Talk</em>
File this one under "Time, Too Much." The secret behind Steve Nash's control over the Suns is revealed to be your everyday psycho-sexual intimidation. H/T reader DH....

I Was There Spring Break Edition: Strippers In Mexico
In 2007, "Lyle" went to Puerto Vallarta for his last college spring break, this is his story....

Erin Andrews And Her <em>Dancing With The Stars</em> Dude Are "Maybe" Dating
This is according to Maksim "Maks" Chmerkovskiy, who sarcastically told Bonnie Fuller's website last week that he and the Sideline Princess could be more than just reality show cha cha partners. They do seem cuddly....

Are CSKA Sofia The Most Dysfunctional Club In Europe?
For the past year or so, rumours have been circulating Manchester City are preparing to star in their own reality TV show....

Hulking Man-Mountain And Pixie Companion Pretend To Be Dead Dolphins
Yup, that's Wladimir Klitschko and Hayden Panettiere protesting a Japanese fishing village's annual dolphin hunt. It could be effective, as it probably reminds the locals of this. [AP]...

Taxpayers Fail To Unsoil Bowden's Legacy
The legal costs for FSU's fruitless fight to overturn those 12 forfeited games? $102,000 in tax dollars, and $70,000 from the boosters' fund. [Florida Times-Union]...

Toni Kukoc And Derek Fisher Have Giant Penises, John Salley Says
Courtesy of John Salley, we're told that the NBA's most famous Croatian export is super-hung for a white boy and that Fisher is "six feet tall with a seven foot dick." Gentlemen, welcome to the geoduck club. [SpiderandtheHenchman]...

Today In Police Intervention At Sporting Events
Courtesy of Puck Daddy, Daniel Rahimi of Rogel scored the game-winner in OT and, like all good villains, "shhh"-ed the crowd. The AIK fans took offense and expressed their disapproval by trying to fight the Rogel coaching staff....

Great Moments In Drunken Spring Break Failure!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Spring Break Failure, where we showcase heartwarming true stories of spring break gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Is Donovan McNabb Dicking The Eagles Around?
If you can think of a better explanation for stating he'd like to be traded to a team that has no intentions of trading for him, I'd like to hear it....

High School Players' Late Father Honored — For All Of Three Months
Due to budget cuts, a Baltimore Catholic school is closing down the court that in December was renamed in memory of the father of two sophomore players. Better than selling the naming rights, I suppose. [Baltimore Sun]...