f Page 3291 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

It's Going To Be A Fun Year In South Bend
This mysterious billboard was erected in South Bend this week, just across the street from the Notre Dame campus. Oh, that's sweet of Irish fans to throw their support behind beleaguered head coach Charlie Weis like....heyyyyyy, wait a second!...

Tony Romo Unsheaths His Sword For Another Blonde Creature
Candice Crawford is the name of the woman who will inevitably serve as a scapegoat for the Cowboys' inconsistent offense this year. [NYDN]...

Pantsless In Purdue
Since Barry's off tonight, I'll pick up the slack on the ridiculous college football team posters beat today. Here is the scantily clad Purdue offensive line from 2000. They were dubbed "The Lifeguards." Goodness. [PurdueBoilermakers]...

Winnipeg Stockpiling Malcontents
Charles Rogers, the original Matt Millen WR bust, will be joining Pac Man in Winnipeg. Since his 2005 release, Rogers has been battling drug addition to return to football. He reportedly still owes the Lions $8.5 Million[PFT]...

Redskins Cut Out Middle Man, Sell Directly To Scalpers
Did I say "scalpers"? That's so politically incorrect! I meant that "brokers" are the ones allowed to buy blocks of tickets from that team with a racial slur nickname, instead of the fans on their notoriously long waiting list....

Boise State To Baffle Opponents With Bright Colors
Please make a note of wardrobe instructions for all Boise State home games, so that you can properly show your support for the Broncos....by creating blinding seizures in opposing quarterbacks and home TV viewers. [BroncoSports]...

Bengals' First Pick's Three-Part Fail: Fat, Injured, And A Bengal
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

A Small Way To Liven Up Any Fantasy Draft
You might've missed this fantasy football draft over the weekend, and it's your loss. Like many, it took place in a hotel room. But unlike most, it featured those two magic little words: midget strippers....

Thomas Howard Likes To Feel Pretty Every Now And Then
"Just finished getting a pedicure. Its been a while since I've had one. It was relaxing for a while there, I even dozed off for a minute." [Twitter via reader Tom]...

Watch As Your Childhood Gets Choked Out
Jason David Frank, best only known as the Green Power Ranger, is entering MMA. His first opponent will be the winless Lord Zedd. [MMA Weekly]...

Reach For The Heavens! Or At Least Use A Ladder
You think embarrassing team photos are a new phenomenon? Check these three light-in-the-loafers Jayhawks from a few years back. I implore you, keep sending these in. After the jump, an unidentified high school team utilizes hardware, for some reason....

The 2009 New York Mets: A Season Of Failure
The New York Mets are not the worst team in baseball. They are not even the most ineptly run franchise in their own division. Yet, their 2009 campaign may have forever redefined the concept of losing....

Oklahoma State Fans Incensed Over New Lame-Ass Fight Song
The Oklahoma State Cowboys are unveiling a new pre-game song this year which has some alumni and current students upset due to the tune's overall nonsensical wussiness. Cowboys Forever, y'all....

Brett Favre's Just A Kid Out There Who Wants To End Your Career
As noted earlier, Brett Favre launched himself in the direction of Eugene Wilson's cruciate ligaments last night — an undeniable prick move that surely no one would chalk up to Favre's oft-cited youthful exuberance. Right?...

No One In Jacksonville Will Be Forced To Watch The Jaguars
Twelve NFL teams could be affected by blackout rules this year—only three teams had blackouts last season—including Jacksonville, where local television may end up broadcasting zero home games. It's still better than living in Tallahassee. [SBJ]...

Matt Ryan Is A Handsome Man, Science Proves
The screeching teenyboppers at the Wall Street Journal bring word that Matt Ryan is the most knee-meltingly dreamy quarterback in the NFL. It's true because science says so. And believe it or not, this actually sort of matters....

Why Your Team Sacks: New England Patriots
Some people are fans of the New England Patriots. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the New England Patriots. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter grou......

What Is The Michigan Story Really About?
Everyone is really worked up about Rich Rodriguez and his problems at Michigan, but maybe there's something else going on here that doesn't have anything to do with the Wolverines....

Thomas Jones Had Some Festive Birthday Party Entertainment
You should see these ladies make balloon animals. It's a sight to behold. [JerseyChaser]...

Why Your Team Sucks: Oakland Raiders
Some people are fans of the Oakland Raiders. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Oakland Raiders. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....