f Page 3361 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Florida High School Pitcher Loves No-Hitters, Beef O'Brady's
Either Patrick Schuster is really good, or the high school teams in the Tampa-St. Pete area totally suck. At any rate, the Mitchell High hurler now has three consecutive no-hitters....

Book Excerpts That Don't Suck: "The Big One"
Who knew a book about a fishing tournament could be so damn compelling? Journalist David Kinney goes inside Martha's Vineyard's annual Striped Bass and Bluefish Derby with his book, "The Big One"....

Scorned Cheerleaders Rat Out Heroic Playboy Model
It's the story you've heard a million times before: Girls cut from cheerleading squad get revenge on coach by exposing her Playboy modeling activities to school, thus getting her fired....

Isiah Thomas Is Florida International's Problem Now
Florida International stinks at basketball, so I guess they figured—if we're going to stink we might as well leave a spectacular stench all over the basketball world. That's the only explanation for hiring Isiah Thomas....

Yep. That's Bruce Pearl Rapping With No Shirt On
The UT athletic department held their third annual VOLSCARS ceremony that I think is supposed to be a play on "Oscars" (as in Academy Awards) but it just reads as "Vol Scars," which is disgusting. Anyway, it's some sort of school-wide ESPY awards and this year's "entertainment" featured head basketb...

Dodger Fan Unable To Dodge Knife
Opening Day at Dodger Stadium went off without a hitch. There was plenty of fighting, gun-waving, knife play, vandalism and general mayhem to keep everyone on their toes....

Condi Rice Says Fuzzy Zoeller Is One Of Her Favorite Golfers
She wrote an essay for the Daily Beast about following Tiger at the Masters (perks) and dropped the line about Fuzzy being one of her favorites. Also, Condi's favorite comedian? Michael Richards. [The Daily Beast]...

Brazilian Soccer Coach Pulls A Woody Hayes
Santilli's team was losing 1-0 on Sunday when he ran out on to the field to retrieve a loose ball, but as he returned to the sideline he decided to lower his shoulder into a player for the opposing team for no reason whatsoever. (Because he was brushed on the shoulder by a 60-year-old man, the playe...

The Queen Of Queens
America's Sideline Princess became America's Baseline Princess, spending most of last night's Citi Field opener giving fans an extensive tour of the new ballpark, while slack-jawed yokels stood idly by and tried not to drool....

Isiah Thomas Is Never Going Away
Rumor has it that Florida International wants to has hired organizational wunderkind Isiah Thomas to be their new head basketball coach. Unbelievable. I guess FIU doesn't have a history department. [ESPN]...

Just One More Out
One of the saddest stories I ever heard was when Harry Kalas was denied the chance to call the Phillies 1980 World Series live due to NBC's broadcast restrictions....

Mark Fidrych Found Dead On His Farm
What the hell is going on today? First Marilyn Chambers, then Harry Kalas, and now former Tiger Mark "The Bird" Fidrych have all passed in away in the span of about 24 hours....

Was Michael Phelps Narced On By Careless Phish Fan?
Even though it was months ago that Michael Phelps' bong-sucking photo captivated The World and perished many endorsement opportunities, there's still some mystery as to how the photo became public. One theory: Phish heads....

Sergio Garcia Says Golf Is Hard!
After finishing 75 and 74 on the weekend, Garcia complained that the course is "too tricky" and not "fair" and something about mudballs in the fairway. Garcia was complaining before he even got to Augusta, he complained during the tournament and now he's complaining after, even trashing the sacred l...

Miami Feels The Pain That Will Last A Lifetime
In the annals of gut-wrenching defeats, you're going to have to dig deep to find one tougher than Miami's collapse against Boston in the NCAA hockey final on Sunday....

Denny Neagle Wants To Poke Your Girlfriend
Be careful when adding former major league pitchers as Facebook friends—or don't complain to us when your girlfriend goes from "In a relationship" to "Catching high heat." [Diamond Hoggers]...

A Boob Grab Unlike Any Other
It's easy to get caught up in the emotion of Sunday at The Masters, but few fans have the determination to use that frenzy to their advantage and sneak in a boob grope at 15....

Your NHL Playoffs Are Ready
The matchups and schedule are set for the first round of the NHL playoffs. I hope your Versus subscription is up to date! [Puck Daddy]...

Now, Tell Me What You See When You Open Up Your Hands?
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...