f Page 3387 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Meet Tebow Sanford Crumley
Naming your children after Florida quarterbacks: Isolated case, or alarming worldwide trend? Tebow Crumley was born on Thursday, and can already bench press 200 pounds and sing all the lyrics to The Pirates of Penzance....

Tiger's Back
This story actually broke last night, but I was unable to write about it then because I immediately got the vapors, then fell and hit my head, and only just now regained motor function....

So TV Writers Do Have A Sense of Humor
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Mike Leach, Texas Tech Finally Renew Their Vows
There were some dicey moments there when we all thought we were looking at the new head coach of Abilene Christian (or, you know, somewhere). But Mike Leach and Texas Tech have come to terms....

Illinois, Penn State Try Out Innovative New Square Basketball On Wednesday
Hey, it wasn't me this time: Scott Van Pelt (he's back!) had this to say about Penn State's 38-33 win over Illinois on Wednesday. "Watching Big Ten basketball is like watching fat people have sex."...

The NBA Trade Deadline: Well, That Was Pointless
Amar'e Stoudamire. Shaquille O'Neal. Vince Carter. Nate Robinson. Tracy McGrady. None of them are going anywhere. A lot of lesser names and expiring contracts got shuffled around today, but really... nothing changed....

The Marvin Harrison Era May Be Over In Indy
Marvin Harrison has played 13 seasons in the NFL, all with the Indianapolis Colts, and nearly all with Peyton Manning throwing the ball to him—but if reports are true, that's all over with now....

Ashton Kutcher Finds His Muse In Kyle Orton
• I hope they have good special effects: How will Ashton Kutcher learn to imitate an NFL quarterback for his new movie? Uh oh. [Sports Brethern]...

The Rather Sad Tale Of Minnesota Wrestling Icon Verne Gagne
Verne Gagne, an 82-year-old wrestling legend who feuded with Hulk Hogan and was an all-conference football player at the University of Minnesota, is being investigated in the death of his 97-year-old roommate....

Did The Mets Redesign Their Horrible Citi Field Patch?
The Mets online store is offering these official hats that include a new "2009 Inaugural" patch that does not appear to have been designed in three seconds by a first grader. [MLB.com]...

I Guess Brian Bocock Calls It Schwing Training
So here's a rather amusing tale from San Francisco Giants beat writer Andrew Baggarly of the San Jose Mercury. Yes, it involves boner pills. Doesn't every Giants' story?...

Locker Room Horror Stories: Colorado State Edition
Following are excerpts from an anonymous letter sent to school administrators at Colorado State, reporting harassment and abuse allegedly perpetrated by four Rams football players against another student in the men's locker room....

A Brief Chat With The Woman Who Took The Iraq Bills Cheerleader Photos
Julie Dermansky, a freelance photojournalist from New York, is currently embedded with the military in Iraq. She agreed to talk to Deadspin about the experience, which included a photo shoot with the Buffalo Bills Cheerleaders....

Bonds' Testicles May Not Have To Testify After All
Attorneys for Barry Bonds on Wednesday made a defense filing that their client's gigantic skull and tiny nuts should not be entered into evidence at his perjury trial....

Bobcats Overcome Confusing Sign To Beat Pacers
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Griffey Picks Seattle Over Atlanta ... Hard to Picture, I Know
Ken Griffey Jr. returns to the cold, wet embrace of the Emerald City, signing one-year deal reported to be for at least $2 million, plus incentives, according to AP. [NBCSports]...

Ashton Kutcher To Ruin Football For An Entire Generation Of Kids
The "actor" will star in a comedy about "a superstar NFL quarterback and a 12-year-old geek who magically trade bodies, then learn valuable lessons about humility and courage." Sigh. [First Cuts]...

The Final Collapse Of Shea Stadium
• That's all, folks: The last piece of Shea Stadium came tumbling down today. Congratulations on a job ... done. [Mets Blog]...

Cole Hamels Should Really Not Let His Wife Speak In Public
The Philadelphia Phillies' ace and his wife, former"Survivor" temptress, Heidi Strobel, have decided to use their good fortune and popularity to add the latest Hollywood accessory to their young family: AIDS orphans....

Larry Johnson Goes Chasing Old Waterfalls To Brighten His Dark Days
The Kansas City Chiefs' disgruntled running back Larry Johnson is taking another chance at romance. Hopefully, this new relationship won't end with spit-covered faces or messy restraining orders. His next victim? That TLC lady....