f Page 3578 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

About Last Night
What you missed while in a meat coma ... • College football: Trojans feast on Sun Devils, restore order to the the universe. USC 44, ASU 24. • NFL: Favre, Romo set up titanic match of 10-1 teams that a lot of people won't see. • College basketball: George Mason is back in the news, to Kansas State's...

Welcome To The Land Of Turducken
Prepare for this exact scene tomorrow: Brett Favre eating turkey and receiving backslaps on the Lions' home field. (We're not sure, but we believe this picture was taken in 1983.)...

Thanks Again, Priest Holmes
It's a sad day, folks: It looks like Priest Holmes is going to retire. Obviously, the brief snapshots of Priest Holmes we've seen this season haven't even remotely resembled the Priest Holmes fantasy wunderkind we once knew, but that doesn't mean we didn't enjoy them immensely. It was just nice to s...

The Eagles Are HUGE Underdogs Sunday
We were pretty amazed to read this this morning: Apparently Sunday night's Patriots-Eagles game has the biggest spread in NFL history. (Well, not exactly: They're not counting expansion teams, for some reason; the Buccaneers were 24-point underdogs to the Steelers in their first season, and lost 42-...

SHOTY First Round: Gilbert Arenas Vs. Steely McBeam
It's SHOTY frenzy this week; two in two days. You now can spend your Thanksgiving playing around with online polls. Fun!...

Jamboroo, Week 12: A Special, Comprehensive Breakdown Of Thanksgiving From An Experienced Fat Person
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon. Except for today, because we're off tomorrow, because it's Thanksgiving....

Well, Our Weekend Is Planned
When you say that USA Today doesn't bring the serious, in-depth news coverage, I counter with this recent headline: Mexican Dwarfs Seek Respect In Bullfighting. I accept your apology. Seriously, how could your day not turn out great when it starts with that headline in your e-mail inbox?...

Frank TV Successfully Lands On Earth
The anticipation is over, everyone; last night, the sainted moment finally came. "Frank TV" debuted! (For four episodes!) So ... how was it? Don't ask us; we didn't watch it. What, you think we're crazy?...


Yet Another Reason Never To Visit Hawaii
OK, maybe Duke's a little better than we realized. And maybe Illinois still hasn't learned how to shoot. Here you see Brian Randle, fouling someone, as usual. Duke's good again, everybody: Spread the word. Then cringe....

Welcome Back, Duke Haters
We know the college basketball is officially underway because ... everyone's Duke bile is building! We've missed it; it's nice having villains, even if they haven't actually done that much lately that was particularly villainous....

After They Lock Up All The Cricket Stars, Are All Of Us Next?
The "Brad Pitt of cricket," Imran Kahn, has been thrown into prison by Pakistani President Gen. Pervez Musharraf for speaking out against the government, and is now on a hunger strike. You thought American politics were a mess? Imagine if Tom Brady was thrown in the slammer for his political views, ...


SHOTY First Round: Kige Ramsey Vs. Joey Chestnut
Because Thursday is, you know, Thanksgiving, we're gonna have voting both today and tomorrow. It'll put you in the mood for tryptophan....

This Week In The SSW
For years — OK, a couple of days — Slate writer Robert Weintraub has been tinkering with a concept called The SSW, short for "The Sean Salisbury Wisdom," which tracks the consensus of the football punditocracy to ensure those triumphant declarations from Friday aren't flushed down the memory hole on...

Andrea Kremer Hearts Tom Brady
It's a few days old now, but, OK, judging from this "interview" from Sunday, it's only a matter of time before Andrea Kremer, Gisele and Tom are all on the Dr. Phil show hashing this out. Such shameless flirting has not been witnessed since Churchill got Roosevelt to agree to the lend-lease program...

Vick Just Can't Wait To Get Himself To Prison
We didn't get into this yesterday, but all told, we find it pretty amazing that Mr. Mexico has decided to check into jail three weeks early. We understand that it's a plan to look contrite in front of the judge ... but it's still taking quite a risk, wethinks....

That Gripping AFC West
We will confess, we did not watch the Monday Night Football game last night; we had a concert, the Illini were on and, frankly, we're gonna get enough football in the coming days. But we take solace in knowing there's a division worst than the Buzzsaw's NFC West....

In A Year, He'll Invade And Occupy Columbus, Georgia
Nick Saban was supposed to be the savior for Alabama football — and hey, the Dolphins sure have taken off since he left — but the team has collapsed down the stretch, losing their last three games, including last week's home loss to Louisiana-Monroe. Fortunately, Saban has been able to keep the loss...