fl Page 1085 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Betts, Bettis ... Whatever It Takes
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Landon Donovan Has Swine Flu
And no, he didn't get it from being showered in urine and vomit by Mexican fans. But here's your excuse for yesterday's match result, Sam's Army. [FanNation]...
Which Version Of Madden Should Take Over Your Life?
If you're reading this from a line outside a 24-hour Wal-Mart, you've probably already made your choice, but if you're unsure which version of Madden 10 you should buy today, consider how you would most like waste your life....
Mike Vick To The Eagles
That's two deceptively immobile black QBs in Philly. The Iggles inked Vick to a two year deal, which begs the question: were they bidding against themselves? Your resident Eagles homer will be along shortly with measured, reasonable analysis. [ESPN]...
Internet Paralyzed By Michael Vick To Buffalo Rumors
Have you heard?! Michael Vick and Tony Dungy are in Buffalo right now signing an eighteen-year deal worth $4 billion. Or maybe he's not in New York State at all? Maybe you're the one who's like....trapped in Buffalo, man!...
And Here Comes The "Pitino Is A Baby Killer" Hysteria
Shockingly, Louisville's pro-life students are not impressed with how their coach handled the post-restaurant floor mom-banging: "Rick Pitino was willing to take his own child's life in order to cover up a cheap, tawdry affair."[ALL.org]...
The UFL Might Actually Be A Practical Joke
The United Football League unveiled its team names and uniforms this week, just hours before tickets went on sale for games you did not realize were taking place, featuring players that may not exist. Is this really happening?...
Donte' Stallworth Suspended For One Year
Roger Goodell dropped a very big hammer on Donte' Stallworth, suspending him without pay for the entire 2009 season. Goodell said: "Without regard to the merits of the disposition of the criminal case, I believe that further consequences are necessary."...
10-Year-Old Hero Closes Door On Jay Cutler Era
Ah, the wisdom of children! It was bad enough when Cutler whined and cried his way to a trade to Chicago, but he crossed another line this week by proclaiming Denver fans to be less than passionate boosters....
What To Expect From "Hard Knocks: Cincinnati Bengals"
The Cincinnati Bengals are not quite the trainwreck they once were, but everyone is still hoping for some kind of entertainment value out of this year's edition of HBO's "Hard Knocks" docudrama. Don't get your hopes up....
The Long Strange Sad Journey Of Lawrence Phillips
Former Nebraska/NFL running back Lawrence Phillips was convicted of seven felony charges yesterday and faces up to 25 years in prison, but he's already in jail, serving a 10-year sentence for another crime. How did it come to this?...
Pittsburgh Steelers Love Their Illegal Gun-Shooting Parties (UPDATED)
Hackles have been raised by photos of a shooting event where civilians, including members of the Pittsburgh Steelers, are seen goofing off with possibly illegal weapons—all courtesy of the Pennsylvania State Police. Hey, gun safety is for Seahawks....
Brady Quinn-Derek Anderson Feud Gets Catty
Derek Anderson and Brady Quinn are both listed as No. 1 on the Browns depth chart, although I don't believe the NFL's plan to add a second football to gameplay will take effect this year. So let the sabotage begin!...
For A Brief Moment, The College Football World Was Turned On Its Head
Our thanks to all 8,358 of you who sent in this screengrab (click to enlarge), which depicts Bruce Feldman, ESPN The Magazine's college football savant, fearlessly forecasting the Florida Atlantic Owls into the national title game....
Vick Speaks To James Brown
Michael Vick has recorded his first post-jail interview with James Brown and it will air on "60 Minutes" this Sunday. (As heard on "The Leitch/Daulerio FunTime Hour"!) Perfect for family dinner-time viewing. [CBS]...
Kenny Williams' No Good, Very Bad Day
First, the White Sox GM finds a moldering, $60 million fourth outfielder on waivers. Then he gets popped in Seattle for jaywalking. Only one of these things is criminally stupid....
Your Daily Dose Of Moral Outrage
Donte' Stallworth, who plea bargained his way to 30 days in jail and two years house arrest, is actually asking a judge to reduce his sentence. Remember to turn your head before spitting out your coffee. [AP/Slowbreaker]...
New Jersey Discovers That Giants, Jets, Nets Don't Fully Love Them
A New Jersey senator wants to strip all taxpayer funding from professional sports teams that aren't proud to admit that they play in New Jersey. That means all of them. As usual, the blame lies with the Nets....
Mina Brees Died As She Lived: Inexplicably
Drew Brees' estranged mother died last week in Colorado, though as of yet it's not known when, how or where exactly....
Not A Game, We Talking 'Bout Malpractice
Tebucky Jones plans to sue New England's team doctors for misdiagnosing his injuries and ending his career. The Mets' class-action suit is still collecting plaintiffs. [NESN]...