i Page 7872 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Escaping Ben Terry's Grasp Is Harder Than You Think
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
This Man Will Not Defecate For Less Than Your Annual Salary
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Michael Beasley's Dad Says He Has Some Serious Issues
Now comes word that Michael Beasley's rehab stay has been planned for a year, and is unrelated to his latest Twitter-related meltdown. What does this teach us, other than that this kid has long-term issues? His father has some ideas....
Today In Antitrust Violations
Nobody will outbid Ontario-bound Jim Balsillie, so the NHL put in their own bid for the Coyotes, and plans to resell the team to someone, anyone, who will keep them in Phoenix. What a goddamn joke. [NHL.com]...
FIU To Boycott Cancer Benefit Unless They Don't Have To Play Mean Old UNC
I believe Oddjack would have set the odds of Isiah Thomas causing controversy at Florida International at 0.5 games into his college coaching career. If you took the under, you are a winner....
Keith Olbermann Will Show You "Jackass"
The LA Times mistakenly listed the MTV show in Countdown's time slot, though Olbermann's totally mature and measured reaction made sure viewers turning in to see Jackass were not disappointed. [TV Squad]...
Bad Golf-As-Sex Metaphors Will Get You Fired
Which do you think this government official really got fired for: showing his peen to a golf course employee, or coming up with a truly awful one-liner?...
How Douche Was My Alma Mater?
With their liberal use of dirty girls and shirtless gods, GQ certainly knows how to bring in the eyeballs, but they have outdone themselves again with their latest listicle: "America's 25 Douchiest Colleges." No, you suck more!...
New Bad Thing Happens To Comically Star-Crossed Organization
Johan Santana's done for the year: "The Mets said Tuesday that Santana will have arthroscopic surgery to clean up bone chips in his left elbow. The team said he's expected to be ready for spring training next year." [AP]...
Little League Pitcher Would Really Like To Plunk This Next Batter
Anyone turned off by the hype placed on the kids at the Little League World Series might find some solace in this live microphone catching a young hurler asking for permission to hit a batter. Yay, for all-access!...
At Last, A Carl Monday Video That Will Never Be Rubbed Out
For too long, the video of wanking correspondent Carl Monday's investigation into the activities of Mike Cooper's right hand has been subject to the whims of copyright enforcement. No longer. Here it is, brand spanking new, archived for all eternity....
Derek Jeter Lovers Still Consistently Loving Derek Jeter's Consistency
Relax everyone. Despite all statistical evidence to the contrary, Derek Jeter is still the best Yankee. Because Paul O'Neill told Mike Lupica he is. How do they keep it doing day after day for all these years? [Daily News]...
Cohort Of Talented Mr. Roto Allegedly Fornicates At Ben Hill Griffin Stadium
"I mean this literally. I snuck in to the stadium, with a girl, and fucked her on the goal line of the south end zone. Right below the goal posts, underneath the national championship signs." WWTTD? [IHopeTheyServeBeerInHell]...
Why Your Team Sucks: BUZZSAW
Some people are fans of the Arizona Cardinals. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Arizona Cardinals. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
What Mysterious (And Heroic) Injury Is Tim Tebow Hiding?
Tebow missed practice! TEBOW MISSED PRACTICE! Something about a stiff back, which shouldn't be a problem for a running quarterback with weak mechanics. But it doesn't matter because he's a walking M.A.S.H. unit that you cannot keep off the field....
Apparently Joanna Krupa Is Not A Fan Of Ryan Braun's Fashion Line
At another one of those REMETEE events (remember: like "remedy" not "ream tea") the model-turned-whatever privately told one photog what she thought of Braun's creation: "It looks like Ozzy Osbourne threw up on you." [Milwaukee Nights]...
Why Your Team Sucks: Detroit Lions
Some people are fans of the Detroit Lions. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Detroit Lions. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
Upon Further Review, Tim Donaghy Back In Jail
The disgraced NBA referee was living in a half-way house while awaiting release on his conspiracy conviction, but has been ordered back to prison because of a unspecified parole violation. The whole thing sounds fixed to me. [AP]...
And Now A Look At The Actual Brett Favre Goat Tied Up In The Lady's Trunk
Finally, you can put your photoshopping skills to rest — the comically cruel Brett Favre goat video has been released to the local news. Yes, the goat, although tied down, is still alive in these photos. [WCCO]...
The Rockies Are A Team Of Destiny ... Again
Two years ago, Colorado's miracle finish lifted a scrappy upstart team to the World Series. Then suddenly they were were terrible again. Now they're on the verge of another miracle comeback. How do they do it (every other year)?...