k Page 3508 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jerry Sandusky's Wife Issues Statement On "False Accusations," Says She "Continues To Believe" In Husband's Innocence
Jerry Sandusky's wife, Dottie, was implicated in accusations against her husband for the first time yesterday after her husband was re-arrested on additional charges and the second grand jury presentment was made public....

Your Rolando McClain Perp Walk Grin Photoshop Roundup
When we put out the call last week for photoshops of the fantastic perp walk photo of Oakland Raiders linebacker Rolando McClain (above), we knew you'd be up to the challenge; we knew you'd make us laugh like all hell at the sheer absurdity of it all. And you didn't disappoint. In all honesty, I w...

Which Group Of St. Louis Residents Is Bidding Albert Pujols Good Riddance? Classical Music Fans
Cardinals fans are reacting strongly to today's news of his departure for Anaheim, leading to surreal images like guards surrounding the statue of him outside his St. Louis restaurant....

Man Falls In Lobby Pool At Winter Meetings, Makes Bigger Splash Than Yankees
Rolling MLB Network cameras caught one distracted visitor taking a spill into the reflecting pool at the Hilton Anatole in Dallas, where baseball's winter meeting are being held. It's all fun and games until somebody gets sued. [MLB.com, via SBN]...

Kris Humphries's Worst Year Ever Culminates In "KRIS IS GAY!" Tabloid Cover
As the year-end lists filter in this month, remember this: Not many people have had a more humiliating year than NBA free agent Kris Humphries. A year ago, Humphries was known as a mediocre pro basketball player who came off a mediocre bench for the mediocre New Jersey Nets. Now, after a 72-day marr...

Everything That's Wrong With <em>Monday Night Football</em>, In One <em>New Yorker</em> Paragraph
There's a long profile of Jon Gruden in this week's New Yorker, which, frankly, is a little like opening up Guns & Ammo and finding a profile of Noam Chomsky, but there it is nonetheless, a zillion finely wrought words about this guy. Two passages are worth noting....

How Much Goddamn Bail Money Does Jerry Sandusky Have?
When Jerry Sandusky was first arrested, a judge with Second Mile connections set Sandusky's bail at $100,000. No problem. Sandusky dropped some coin and walked out of the clink.* Yesterday, he was re-arrested after two additional alleged victims came forward and added their horrifying stories to the...

The Feel-Good Scam Of Owning The Packers
For just the fifth time in their 92-year history, the publicly owned Green Bay Packers launched a stock offering this week, issuing at least 250,000 shares to anyone who wants to count themselves as an owner of an NFL team. It's an irresistible offer for a devoted fan, and within 11 minutes of stock...

Just In Time For Army-Navy: An Army Assistant Coach Is Accused Of Being A Deadbeat Dad
A woman claims Black Knights defensive tackles coach Clarence Holmes, who is married to someone else, is the father of her 22-month-old son. She says Holmes has provided little in the way of child support and has not added the boy to his health insurance, leaving her stuck without a way to pay for ...

Report: Albert Pujols To Sign With The Angels
Tim Brown of Yahoo appears to have had it first, as you can see above, but Buster Olney's sources are telling him the same thing. Bob Nightengale of USA Today says it's for 10 years and $250 million. Somebody check on Leitch to make sure he's OK. [Yahoo]...

Drew Brees Loves Dome, ESPN Informs
Your morning roundup for Dec. 8, the day we learned Ryan Seacrest is a hot commodity. Photo via Thomas W. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Ken Rosenthal Throws Himself Against The Wall
Your roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day. Photo via @joecapMARLINS. This is ... HOT FUCKING STOVE!!...

Ricky Rubio Can't Believe How Much Basketball These Crazy Americans Play
Ricky's finally set to play NBA ball, but there's a learning curve here in Amurrica: "Yesterday I was looking at the schedule and putting in my iPad, and I was saying 16, 17, 18," he joked with reporters today. "I mean, three games in a row? What the hell?" Also news for Rubio: It snows in Minnesota...

Former Dolphin Says Nick Saban Calmly Stepped Over Convulsing Teammate In '05
We'll make this one brief, because if it is true, than it is stale by about six years—but we do jump at any opportunity to point out instances in which Nick Saban might have behaved like a dick, and this anecdote certainly qualifies....

Nick Saban Was Irrational For Not Being <em>More</em> Selfish
My favorite family legend involves my dad's baby sister—my "Тетка," in Macedonian—Bonnie. As the story goes, Bonnie's first-grade class organized a Brownie troop, and their first act was to elect a troop leader. When they counted the votes, Bonnie was the only girl who hadn't voted for herself. Upse...

Not Even Degenerate Gamblers Care About Monday's Horrible Rams/Seahawks Game
According to Bodog's Sportsbook Manager, this week's Monday Night Football game is shaping up to see a historical lack of action. Says Richard Gardner, "with Bradford and Feeley both being questionable, and the fact that the game is on the West Coast this game is pacing to be the lowest bet Monday N...

Erick Dampier Is Literally A Textbook Example Of Irrational Behavior
In general, I don't give Erick Dampier much thought, and I'm guessing neither do you. He is far from an NBA superstar, and if he's at all memorable, it's only for having once been memorably overpaid....

Jerry Sandusky Re-Arrested On Additional Charges That He Performed Oral, Anal Sex On Pre-Teen Boys
Jerry Sandusky was re-arrested on 12 additional charges of sexual abuse today. He was reportedly dressed in a Penn State track suit at the time of his arrest in State College. While "at least" five more people have come forward with allegations against the former football assistant since the origina...

FBI Investigates Russian Plot To Hack World Cup Bids, And Other FIFA-Related Treachery
When the wining World Cup bids were announced last year, it was hard not to wrinkle a Corrugator supercilii muscle. Russia had beat out luckless England for the 2018 World Cup. Even weirder was that Qatar had triumphed over the mighty USA for 2022. Now a squad of FBI agents attached to the "Eurasian...

"Do You Think Your Nomination Into The HOF Illegitimizes The HOF?" And Other Awkward Questions For Tim McCarver
The media conference call with Tim McCarver that accompanied this morning's announcement of his Hall of Fame award got off to a rocky start (which may have been our fault) when the first question was "What, exactly, is your vendetta against the New York Yankees?" It went downhill from there, espec...