k Page 3724 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Cockblocked by Imagined Transgenderism! GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

"Unnamed" Viking Expresses Thoughts On New NFL Safety Rules Via White Board
Following NFL releasing a new safety video, one that shows Seahawks punter Jon Ryan getting hit "cleanly" by the Bears Earl Bennett, Vikings punter Chris Kluwe—I mean "someone"—shared his thoughts on the perceived hypocrisy of the league. Kluwe will be fined by Roger Goddell later today. [@ChrisWar...

Boy, I Bet This Fan Regrets Threatening Wayne Rooney's Life Now
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

'Rally Monkey' Creator Destitute, Selling World Series Ring
Former Angels production manager Robert Castillo has been out of work since being fired in 2007, and is asking for $19,000 for his 2002 World Series ring. The monkey, meanwhile, spent all of his earnings on hookers and blow. [CNBC]...

Chip Kelly Doesn't Want To Hear About How Boise St. Beat Oregon Last Year, OK?
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Oregon head football coach Chip Kelly....

ESPN Reporter Falls For Hoax, Busts Up Hotel Room
Elizabeth Moreau was in a Gainesville hotel to cover a UF volleyball game for ESPNU, when she got a phone call. Hijinks definitely ensued....

So, What's Magic Johnson Up To?
In the last few days, Magic Johnson has sold his share of the Los Angeles Lakers and his stake in 105 Starbucks franchises for a rumored sum in the neighborhood of $100 million. So, uh, what's going on there?...

Canes To Beat FSU
Former Florida State TE Kamari Charlton overstayed his visa in Singapore, and now faces six months in prison and a caning. [Orlando Sentinel]...

Here's Some Adorable Children Doing Adorable Things
I love (and regularly wager on) Mites on Ice, when they let a bunch of kids play hockey during intermissions. But these little tykes at Tuesday's Capitals game set a new standard for awwww with their team goal celebration....

Sports Radio Show Caller Says Funny Thing To Les Miles, Is Cut Off Immediately (UPDATE)
Les Miles was on the radio and a caller got past the screeners to alert Les that it was he—the caller—who had taken the nude photos of him—Les Miles—Jordan Jefferson has been using as leverage for playing time....

The Time Is Now To Rise And Set Fire To James Dolan: Gus Johnson Out At MSG
Gus Johnson is leaving MSG and will be getting future buckets with CBS and Showtime exclusively . Unlike the Knicks, college basketball, boxing, and the NFL are exciting things. [Fish Bowl]...

Bleacher Report Editors Demand Bleacher Report Writers Be Less Retarded
If you are one of those unlucky sports fans who has to slog through Bleacher Report's Google-raping SEO "stories" when you do a general news search for a topic about an athlete, team, or topseventeensidelinereportersthechileancoalminersshouldhavesexwith, this is great news....

Gareth Bale Can Still Beat Inter Milan On The Aggregate
Elderly midfielder Javier Zanetti became the oldest goalscorer in Champions League history when he opened proceedings after just two minutes, and Spurs found themselves 3-0 down within a quarter of an hour after keeper Gomes was sent off for bringing down Jonathan Biabany....

How San Francisco: Grandma Loves Baseball Team, BDSM
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

The University Of Nebraska Is Now Auctioning Off Game-Worn Jerseys For Profit
The Cornhuskers' official online auction website has about 158 jerseys up for bidding, all from their October 16 loss to Texas. Opening bids start at $250. I wonder how Georgia's A.J. Green feels about this....

Minnesota Wild Fan Warns Rick Rypien That He, Too, Is Going To Lawyer Up
James Engquist, the 28-year-old who was "grabbed" by Canucks forward Rick Rypien last night, told the Star Tribune that he is "seeking legal representation" because he was "assaulted, that's just the bottom line." What a day for lawyering up!...

Ever Wonder What It's Like When The Police Get You Stoned And Make You Drive Around?
But, you know, without living in some crazy, entrapment-filled police state? I hadn't either, but thankfully LA Times columnist Steve Lopez got to smoke some dank shit from some CHiPs—ha, chips—officers and then drive around for his and our amusement....

Oh Look, Enthusiastic Madden Guy Is Back
Yeah, he knows he's Internet famous now. Or maybe this is all viral marketing for crappy Vizio TVs. [NSFW language]...

Your "The Steinbrenners Need To Hire Seatfillers" Rangers-Yankees Open Thread
The first elimination game for New York since 2007. Luckily for them, they have CC Sabathia going. Unluckily, he has the highest ERA of any Yankee starter this postseason. Ooze your schadenfreude in the comments. (Image via Reddit user)...

Kenny Mayne "Prefers Fornicating Horses," ESPN.com Informs
An amusing double-entendre about Kenny Mayne! Bring me the finest meats and cheeses!...