k Page 3776 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Meet The Mets, Greet The Mets, Get The Goddamn Mets Tattooed All Over Yourself
A Bronx man has the names of 35 of his favorite Mets players tattooed on his arms, including Mike Piazza and Francisco Rodriguez. He's running out of space, but might have just enough room for Butch Huskey and Mo Vaughn. [NY Post]...

Crucial Relationship Advice Spoken Drunkenly To Teenagers: Cheat On All Your Girlfriends
I went to a bachelor party this weekend in a seaside town. There was eating, and drinking, and a failed attempt to get two Polish Food Lion clerkettes to come over and massage the groom....

Ricky Rubio Had A Miserable Draft Night, According To His (Platonic) Escort
A year ago, Ethan Sherwood Strauss worked as Rubio's league-assigned escort at the NBA Draft, which made him privy to the young Spaniard's innermost thoughts. Such as: "They drafted ANOTHER point guard? Why?" [Free Darko]...

Obama Takes A Firm Stand Against The Wave
The president probably gained a few more votes by refusing to take part in one of the worst stadium traditions. His daughter, on the other hand, needs a firm talking-to. [via Power Line]...

Golf Is Now A Contact Sport
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in this morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

World Cup Open Thread: Portugal-North Korea
Apologies for the delay this morning. Portugal's up 1-0 in the muck at halftime at Green Point Stadium. Discuss below. UPDATE: North Korea heroically holds the Portuguese to fewer than eight goals, according to a Pyongyang news agency....

Lady Gaga Banned From Yankee Stadium Clubhouse For Being Lady Gaga
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in this morning retardedly hot afternoon. Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...

World Cup Open Thread: Slovakia-Paraguay
Good morning. Who's ready for another day of soccer action? Can Paraguay continue playing above their heads? Can Slovakia regroup after allowing a stoppage time equalizer? Follow the action and comment below....

What Is North Korean Striker Jong Tae Sae Actually Crying About?
(Aside from Manute Bol.) Anyway, a headscratcher I've been puzzling over for a few days now: what's with sobbing guy on the North Korean national team? Guy has never even had to live in North Korea!...

Don't Let Notre Dame Touch You There, Big Ten
So Lou Holtz finally wants Notre Dame in The Big 10. I never took him for a bandwagoner, but his assessment that the conferences are eventually going to split into a few mega-conferences isn't lacking for evidence....

World Cup Open Thread: Cameroon-Denmark
Pretty much a must-win for both teams after opening-game losses. Are we having fun yet?...

Sorry Scott, We Are All Malians Now
I too felt a twinge of something almost like patriotism when I read of the latest attempt to burgle America of its greatness carried out by a shockingly brazen African thug. Then I remembered the thug in the White House....

Why We Must Invade Mali
FIFA's review of Koman Coulibaly won't answer the question of how someone with two lazy eyes and a day job as financial auditor for the notoriously corrupt Malian government was allowed to be a World Cup official in the first place....

Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup For June 18
Yesterday was a fantastic day. The U.S. played in the most exciting — and controversial — game of the tournament, perhaps creating some new soccer junkies in the process....

Chaos Shall Reign Again: Deadspin Anarchy Editing Duo In Full Effect
Greetings, you tawdry bastards. Tomorrow this site will be overtaken by everyone's favorite sentence assassin, The Great Moe Tkacik with special assistance from the artist formerly known as The Baghdad Diarist, Scott Thomas Beauchamp. Engage....

Annoying Use Of The Vuvuzela Throughout History: The Sequel
Last week, we compiled several great moments in history, film, and the internet and set them to the now-iconic buzzing of the vuvuzela. Here's a sequel. Please add your suggestions in the comments below. We'll do another of these soon....

More Underaged Kids Drinking Overwatered Beer: A Weekly Roundup From The Tips Forum
We get many fantastic tips in our inbox and from the #tips forum. Some are not so great. These are some of those #tips we specifically overlooked or ignored. All apologies....

Science: Skateboarders Get Measurably Gnarlier In The Presence Of Pretty Ladies
Researchers measured skateboarders after every move, and "consistent with predictions, the young men had higher testosterone levels and took bigger risks when good-looking women were watching." [Miller-McCune]...

Steve McNair Not Allowed To Rest In Peace
One Nashville man is working tirelessly to reopen the investigation into Steve McNair's death. Or at least, to sell his own amateurish self-published conspiracy theory book....

Cockblocked By The Bassist’s Poop! GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....