k Page 3828 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

She Also Doesn't Finish On Top, Nudge Nudge, Wink Wink, Say No More
Odd headline from the front page of the Orlando Sentinel sports section: "Danica Patrick won't toot your flute or mess up her lipstick." Very 1950s, in both sexism and euphemism. [Orlando Sentinel]...

Welcome To NY, T-Mac
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Stories That Don't Suck: Seduced By Ebersol, Produced By Arledge, Fish, Near-Death Psychedelia
Every week, I'll excerpt a handful of stories — old and new, sports and otherwise, relevant and merely sublime — that I urge you to read for one reason or another. Send any suggestions to [email protected]....

Epic Beard Man Talks About "The Fight", And Many, Many Other Things
Here's an interview with Tom Slick himself, where he provides an expletive-laced background to the infamous bus battle, possibly confesses to numerous felonies, and speaks on several other topics that make you question whether he should be speaking on camera....

Australian Figure Skating Announcers Criticized for Homophobic Broadcasting Style
Sample on-air exchange between Channel 9's Mick Molloy (pictured) and Eddie McGuire: 'They don't leave anything in the locker room these blokes, do they?' 'They don't leave anything in the closet either, do they?' More like a triple LULZ!...

Last Night's Winner: British Skeletoners
In sports, everyone is a winner- some people just win better than others. Like Amy Williams, whose gold in skeleton summarily refuted two British stereotypes - that they suck at the Winter Olympics, and that they don't have purty teeth....

Just Imagine If He'd Won Gold
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Gary Coleman Would Not Like To Apologize For His Actions
In other scandal-ridden relationship news, Gary Coleman overcompensates for his short stature by telling "The Insider" round table to promptly go fuck themselves....

At Yankee Stadium, Boxing Beats Bar Mitzvah
Boxing will make a triumphant return to Yankee Stadium, with a junior middleweight title fight pitting Yuri Foreman against Miguel Cotto. But it'll come at the expense of young Scott Ballan, who may never become a man....

The Cold War Is Officially Back On
Evgeni Plushenko: "I was positive that I won. But I suppose Evan needs the medal more than I do. Maybe it's because I already have one." Oh, your plan all along was to un-retire to be runner-up, then? Burn. [WaPo]...

Tailpipe: "Let's Go For The Pole Today"
We recently discovered the incredible phenomenon of NASCAR-themed romance fiction, stories filled with passion and grease and beautiful people being driven swiftly to ecstasy and Victory Lane alike. What follows is a brief selection from one such tale....

T.O., Fierce and Fabulous: A Weekly Roundup From The Tips Forum
We get many fantastic tips in our inbox and from the #tips forum. Some are not so great. These are some of those #tips we specifically overlooked or ignored. All apologies....

Great Moments In Drunken Hookup Failure: Promise Rings, Triple C-Blocks, And Withering Rejections
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase six heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Mark Ingram, Mateen Cleaves, The Heisman, And A Baby: Explained!
Finally, a backstory for the most random photograph we've ever received. It involves making sure Mateen Izzy Cleaves Jr. grows up with unrealistic expectations. [Lost Lettermen]...

How A Luger Got Stonewalled Over His Concerns About Whistler's Deadly Track
"What happened in Whistler, what happened to the Georgian athlete," says Werner Hoeger, a two-time Olympic luger, "I thoroughly believe that the [International Luge Federation], Canadian Luge Association, and the IOC are responsible."...

Are You Ready For A Worldwide Dodgers Empire?
Frank McCourt has big plans for the Dodgers brand. Try a football stadium, couple of cable channels, expansion to China, and — because it's worked so well for American owners — a Premier League team....

Tiger Woods: An Apology In Three Acts
Gawker.TV genius Mike Byhoff has reduced Tiger Woods's apology to its most basic elements: Tiger repeatedly saying he's sorry, Tiger repeatedly talking about family, and Tiger repeatedly sounding like some sort of yogi....

Circuit Court, Where A Kid Can Be A Kid
A patron is suing Chuck. E. Cheese's for $50,000 for injuries suffered after being hit in the head with an air hockey puck. That thing weighs like 2 ounces; who is the plaintiff, Eric Lindros? [Chicago Bar-Tender]...

Josh Howard: Party Monster
Howard might have been jumping for joy inside when he got traded to Washington. Not because the Wizards are any good, but because it was in Washington last month that he drank so much, he couldn't play the next day....

Everyone's Overqualified To Cover The Nats, But Especially This Guy
Because Nationals Park is more hazardous and soul-numbing than Helmand Province, the Washington Post's new beat writer is a Pulitzer Prize winner. I'd rather be that Pulitzer winner who got laid off. [WaPo]...