k Page 4034 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Feet Shouldn't Be Pointing That Way
Thanks to PFT who finally found an embeddable video of the gruesome leg injury suffered by the Vikes' Charles Gordon. If you've eaten within the last hour, you may want to pass on this for now. There's no update on Gordon's status, but one could make the assumption after viewing that his season — at...

World Series of Poker Resuscitated by ESPN Cameras
ESPN's gambit to shut down the World Series of Poker for four months to give them time to pump up the nine participants at the final table (and position the final table action in a better time slot and month for them) seems to have paid off, with ratings up on the shows leading up to the main event'...

Saturday Night Live Blog: #9 Oklahoma State at #2 Texas Tech
The Big XII has thirteen teams in the Top 10, and this is just another night in which two of them square off on a Saturday night. The undefeated Red Raiders get their second straight prime-time big game against the once-defeated Cowboys. Brent Musberger and Kirk Herbstreit brand cows with their init...

Obama Love Can Have No Boundaries (Like Decorum)
This is Vancouver's General Motors Place, home of the Vancouver Canucks. During Tuesday's Canucks-Predators game, the largest cheer came for Barack Obama's ascendancy in American politics. Our time in Canada involved mostly two questions, ad nauseum: "Are you an American?" and "Isn't it great about ...

Afternoon Blogdome: Cause AI and Obama Both Have Lousy Shot Selection
• Rasheed Wallace hooks up the Pistons with Obama Undrcrwn gear, which leads to a very unfortunate AI-Obama comparison from a very white man in desperate need of a segue. [Need4Sheed] • Beisketboll has been berry berry good to Josh Childress in Greece: "We watched a bartender kneel at his feet, and ...

Beckett, Lester Take Aim at Charity (and Pull Trigger)
Josh Beckett, putative Red Sox ace, believes the best charity comes at the end of a shotgun. Therefore, he has gathered all his rowdy friends (including fellow hurler Jon Lester-Who-Once-Had-Cancer, comedian Bill Engvall, and singer Troy Gentry) to his ranch this weekend, where they will hold the fi...

No Word If Kutcher Is Asking Them For Painkillers
If you thought appearing in a bunch of shitty movies and banging some waif who was barely girl-next-door hot 20 years ago would impress a group of high school freshman football players, dude, you'd be, like, totally wrong and shit! There's a fun report out from Star regarding Ashton Kutcher's latest...

Week In Review: Don't You Wish We All Could Be As Happy As Baby Mangino?
Here are some of this week's stories that didn't have anything to do with Caitlin Davis. • The Brady Quinn era begins...with a loss • How to open a beer with ...Nazi shark! • Joey Porter: professional trash talker • More trouble for the Olson family.• Barack Obama is elected: Some surprisingly good ...

New York Rangers Still Have Receipt For Dead Prospect
It's been almost four whole weeks since the New York Rangers' top draft pick Alexei Cherepanov collapsed and died during a league game in Russia, so the team probably figures that enough time has passed that someone should address the needs of those who have been most effected by this senseless trag...

How Much Do LSU Fans Hate Nick Saban? The Coonass Bowl Is Upon Us
Wright Thompson of ESPN hung out with some LSU fans two weeks ago for the Georgia-LSU game. Not surprisingly LSU fans were focused less on Georgia and more on their hate for Nick Saban. The result is a rollicking story of what happens when you get dumped for a hated rival and then your former coach...

College Football Preview: John Parker Wilson's Cell Phone Belongs to the Cajuns
Alabama's John Parker Wilson is the latest SEC player attempting to overcome the LSU fans snagging his cell phone number and listing it everywhere on the internets. Confounding Cajuns. You'll recall that earlier this season Knowshon Moreno and A.J. Green were the victims. They joined Tim Tebow from...

Buck Burnette Just Can't Stop Apologizing for Absent-Minded Facebook Racism
After Texas backup center Buck Burnette was kicked off the team for his idiotic Facebook status comment, he issued a sincere apology that, at the very least, proved he knew what he did was wrong. The online contrition tour continues for Burnette, and now he's fired off another apology via Longhorn f...

Marathon Runners Have Trouble Following Directions
In a move that was reminiscent of the lady runner who didn't get a prize despite running the fastest time in a San Francisco marathon, another speed demon was recently disqualified from his race despite running the 26.2 miles faster than anyone else that day. Unlike the school teacher (who eventuall...

Well, They're Back To Square One With The Old Folks Home Flasher Case
Former sprint champion Mark Walcott was cleared on Thursday of charges that he exposed himself five times at two old folks homes in Britain, but at what cost? During the trial it was revealed that Walcott was having affairs with two women at the same time, both of whom were hauled into court to prov...

When All Else Fails, Imply That They're Gay
The war of words between Joey Porter and, oh, everybody went from moderately amusing barbs to junior high homosexual jokes, which is typical in the hypersensitive, homophobic world of professional football players. When Porter questioned the NFL allowing Jaguars receiver Matt Jones to still play aft...

Chicago Fans Remain Classy Even When It Comes To Soccer
I'm not sure whether this represents a particular disdain for ESPN, or if Chicago fans just enjoy flipping the bird in general ... I'm guessing the latter. One thing we do know: The time of Boston sports dominance really does appear to be over. As I'm sure you're aware, Chicago beat New England on T...

Fox Attack Victim Courageously Steps Forward With Harrowing Tale Of Survival
The identity of the Prescott, Ariz. fox attack victim has finally been revealed. Here is Michelle Felicetta, who agreed to step forward today so that her harrowing tale might serve as a warning to others who travel in fox-infested areas. We caution you that the details of her ordeal are not for the ...

Who Can Reassemble The Smoldering Rubble That Is The Oakland Raiders?
As bad as things are going for the San Francisco 49ers this season, they aren't even close to being the most dysfunctional football team in the Bay Area. Just how bad are things in Raiderland, on a scale of 1 to Armageddon? Cornerback Nnamdi Asomugha (pictured) and safety Gibril Wilson are now talki...

Lute Olson Soap Opera Gets A Little More Creepy
It's safe to say that the last couple years of Lute Olson's life have been difficult. Health problems and a nasty public divorce led him to miss most of last season on the bench at Arizona and walk out on his team just before this one began. But it seems that the split from his wife, Christine, is e...

Steve Spurrier Inspires Great Art
This one I call, Man Being Aggressively Clawed By Chicken. But it's not that at all. It is of course South Carolina coach and football god Steve Spurrier, who just happens to inspire the artist in all of us. In this portrait he is watched over by the SC Gamecock, just as St. Michael the archangel wa...