k Page 4071 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Favre Protesters Mark The Coming Of End Times
The Favre shit is going to drag out longer than the war in Iraq. First presidential candidate to put the kibosh on this story gets my vote in the next six elections. It can even be Ralph Nader. He was right about the Kings-Lakers series years back, after all. Anyway, a bunch of fucking Cheesetards ...


Madonna Begged For This To Happen
Jose Canseco is probably going to need some help with the fighting scenes in his grand Yuen Woo-ping-choreographed kung fu movie, because, well, dude can't fight. Last night he was dealt a first-round knockout at the fisted hands of former Philadelphia Eagles return man Vai Sikahema in Atlantic Cit...

These Are Clapping Dogs, Rhythmic Dogs, First-Pitching Dogs, House Dogs, Street Dogs
Uno, who I believe was named for the card game I never bothered to learn, continues to blaze trails for doggykind. Back in February, he became the first beagle ever to win the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show (though Snoopy remains the first to be a World War I flying ace). Yesterday, he "threw" ou...

Wladimir Klitschko vs. Tony Thompson Open Thread
Wladimir Klitschko and Tony Thompson are readying to square off in Hamburg (in Color Line Arena, no less) for the heavyweight title on HBO. Ukraine's Klitschko is the heavy favorite, but D.C. native Thompson (whose back story was sufficiently limned by this insidious rag) has the power and size, if...

Lima Time Returns To The States
We've had an absurd dedication around these parts with bringing you the latest developments in the career of Jose Lima. Is it his infectious ebullience on the mound? Or the fact that his wife is stacked? Hard to say. When last we heard from Lima Time, he was still whooping it up with the Kia Tigers...

That's A Stanley Cup You Can Keep
Every team that wins the Stanley Cup parties hard with the Holy Grail. The Detroit Red Wings are no different, even if they've been a little rough with the trophy. Most teams, however, don't allow family members to shit in it, as Kris Draper did....

Canadians Deploy Secret Weapon: Gentle Mocking
Looks as though the "Ruin Romo" craze has made its way to our neighbor to the north,...[checks map] Canadia! A few fans were taunting A-1 Rodboy yesterday with pictures of Madge. Lenny Kravitz might have been more effective, as evidenced by A-Rod collecting one of the Yankees' two hits....

Peter King Knows The Motivations Of His Bretty Boy
Favraro's Log. Gunsling Date: Sometime in the middle of the ponderous NFL off-season where shit like this can dominate the headlines for weeks on end. Somewhere, off the distance, did hove into view a great assemblage of bullshit about Brett Favre. FUCK! It's coming right for us! Take evasive actio...

The All-Seeing Eye Thinks Your Hair Looks Fine
The curtailing of the About Last Night... feature eliminates some of my opportunity for monkeyshines (that is, gratuitous monkey references shoehorned into otherwise putatively sports-related posts). But this Sauron-esque picture from last night's Marlins-Dodgers games caught my, uh, notice. Best u...

Transitions Are Happening All Over
• Clay Travis comes on board and No Homo Nation comes alive...

Brett Favre Asks For Release From Packers, Wants To Play Elsewhere
This time it's not a text message. NFL Live's Chris Mortensen is reporting that Brett Favre has asked for his release from the Green Bay Packers. Apparently, the Packers really didn't want him darkening the Lambeau hallways anymore and are set to move ahead with Aaron Rodgers. If the Packers grant h...

Introducing Your New Weekend Crew
It is my distinct pleasure to announce the formation of a new stable of writers who will be handling weekend duties here at Deadspin. Beginning in August we'll be featuring four new primary weekend writers, as well as two tremendous swing contributors who will presumably write for the site while not...

Obama Sponsoring NASCAR #49 car at Pocono
Seeing John McCain's stealthy move with the Pittsburgh Steelers D-Line, Obama has raised him another sporting degree by becoming the first presidential candidate ever to sponsor an entire car. At least according to Sports Illustrated. This highlight of American political life is set to occur on Augu...

The Evolution Of Jason Whitlock: Writer Unloads On "Football Night In America", But Lightens Up About Gangsta Rap
Kansas City Star/Fox Sports columnist Jason Whitlock must have inhaled a larger portion of hater-tots than his usual allotment before he sat down to write this column about NBC's revamped "Football Night In America" lineup. Whitlock, like many other media members, is skeptical of adding Patrick into...

Jelena Jankovic Gets Proactive About That Not-So-Fresh Feeling
You know, back in the days before I was married it used to take panties coming off to get me excited. Now panties going on does the trick just as well. In related news noted women's right advocate Justin Gimelstob announced that all women should play without panties on the WTA....

Charles Barkley Reluctantly Puts Me In His Fave Five
When NBC Sports asked if I'd blog portions of this year's American Century Championship celebrity golf tournament, of course I said yes. At what other event would I get a chance to interview FOUR participants of Dancing With the Stars? But gradually more details emerged, and I was not amused. The sh...

Philadelphia's Excitement For Elton Brand Begets Resourceful Fashion Design Work
This Sixer fan, also swept up in Elton Brand fever, has no time to wait for local sporting goods outlet stores to get the newest prized jersey in stock, obviously....

Take A Tour Of Figjam Palace
The palatial 4.55-acre estate you see here is golfer Phil Mickelson's home in Rancho Sante Fe, Calif — and it could all be yours. Ignore all that subprime slowdown gloom and doom — this is an absolute steal. Priced between $10,750,000 - $12,225,876, it includes a spa, two guesthouses, a putting gree...