list Page 9 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Best Things We Heard In 2018
King Princess has exactly six real songs out and every single one of them is good as hell. “1950” is a perfect pop song that you better like or else you’re the cops, and it’s not even the best song on her debut EP. Friendship ended with Lorde; now King Princess is new best friend. - Patrick Redford...

The Best Things We Read In 2018
Let’s get this out of the way up top: Yes, I agree, you wouldn’t think a cultural history of Oklahoma City would make for a compelling book. (I’ve had this conversation a lot this year.) But Sam Anderson’s Boom Town is the most engrossing piece of writing I’ve read all year. The book weaves together...

<i>A Christmas Story</i> Subplots, Ranked
Christmas feels incomplete without at least four-to-six partial viewings of A Christmas Story, Bob Clark’s 1983 movie based on Jean Shepherd’s semi-autobiographical stories. By now, if you have a heart, you’ve seen each segment and running subplot dozens of times. But which are the best? And which a...

Conservative Gays Need To Shut The Fuck Up
On Tuesday, conservative rag The Federalist—a website perhaps best known for its endorsement of statutory rape and its former use of a “Black Crime” tag—published an opinion blog by a gay guy named Chad Felix Greene titled “The Stigma Against My Conservative Politics Is Worse Than The Stigma Of Bein...

Grinch Burns, Ranked
1. Your soul is an appalling dump heap, overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable, mangled up in tangled-up knots....

Holidays, Ranked
Here is a list of (commercialized) U.S. holidays, ranked in order of how good they are:...

The 19 Boringest Athletes Of All Time<em></em>
Today, we’re talking about pistachios, cults, Costco, crying, and more....

Hypothetical Grievances Presented By An Australian Newspaper To Defend Its Big-Lipped Serena Williams Cartoon, Ranked<em></em>
To riff on Serena Williams’s spat with umpire Carlos Ramos in the U.S. Open final, the Melbourne Herald Sun published an illustration of the tennis player, drawn by editorial cartoonist Mark Knight, which has since been met with international disgust. Today, like any normal newspaper, the Herald Sun...

The Five Best Conor McGregor Fights
After a two-year absence spent looking at boats, pretending to box, and destroying a bus with a metal barricade, Irish puncher Conor McGregor’s return to the UFC octagon is finally nigh. On Oct. 6 in Las Vegas, McGregor will meet terrifying Russian pressure wrestler Khabib Nurmagomedov for the UFC l...

Looney Tunes Characters, Ranked
Who would do this? And why? Drew Magary would, was the thing, and was gonna, and I’d rather die than let his rankings speak for the site and wind up with history recording that the place where I work said “R&B/Soul” was the second-best Looney Tunes character of all time. So we turned it into a scien...

Dirks Nowitzki, Ranked
Alex Kennedy of HoopsHype has posted some excellent videos that track the evolution of specific player avatars in NBA video games over the last two decades. By far the most cursed sequence is Dirk Nowitzki’s. If you were expecting a steady, linear progression from “Not Dirk” to “Okay that’s Dirk” as...

Announcing Cliches In Soccer, Ranked
The World Cup didn’t quite feel the same without Ian Darke to call it, but at least there was another month of (mostly) British announcers populating our soccer broadcasts. Here’s a celebration of the phrases only heard when watching the beautiful game....

A Soccer Oaf's List Of The Best Soccer Things
Because it’s the most popular sport in the world and because the entire world is currently losing its collective shit about it, there is something forbidding about approaching soccer from the outside. There are many millions of people around the world who are so passionate about club teams that they...

GIFs, Ranked
Today is my last day at Deadspin after seven years of forcing you to watch dumb shit I saw on TV. To commemorate my departure, I went through all 5,128 animated GIFs I created during my tenure here to select, and rank, the best of them....

Times Of Day For Fireworks, Ranked
Some folks outside my apartment were shooting off fireworks around noon today. Why would you waste them like that? I’m not sure, but this is when you should set off fireworks....

Potential 2018 NBA Finals Outcomes, Ranked
1. Cavaliers def. Warriors...

Basic Mixed Drinks, Ranked
All right-thinking people would tell you that the best mixed drink, especially in the summer, is a whiskey ginger, hangover be damned. Unfortunately, we have many wrong-thinking people here at Deadspin. ...

My Enemies In Nature, Ranked
It’s more or less springlike now, pending yet another cruel and absurd outbreak of The Eternal Winter of 2017-18. Here in my absurd forest dwelling, spring means that we are emerging, pallid and blinking, to plant new trees and azaleas, to try with ludicrous and doomed vanity to restore some mowable...

Various Trader Joe’s Foodstuffs, Ranked<em></em>
(NOTE: Beer and wine not included.)...
