nfl Page 945 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Peyton Apologists Scramble to Prepare For Monday
It's always a bit difficult for a quarterback to lose a favorite receiver and a couple of offensive linemen, but Peyton is making it look torturous. Even with Reggie Wayne and Dallas Clark Peyton has gone 12-26 for 104 yards and an interception. If they can't find a way to put up some more points th...

Carson Palmer Goes Long
Nobody in their right mind actually cares about the outcome of the Bengals/Cardinals contest (Will and Bengal fans are clearly insane), but the fantasy playoffs are right around the corner! Carson Palmer is doing his best to spread the points around. He's thrown touchdown passes to TJ Housh and Ariz...

Jamboroo, Week 11: A Quick Tribute To The Strongest Motherf—ker In The NFL
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....

MNF Used To Keep Prisoners In Line. Really.
When "Monday Night Football" made its move from ABC to ESPN two years ago, we argued that it wasn't really a big deal at all; the notion of cable as "pay TV," something that few can watch, seemed archaic. Jeez, who doesn't have cable anymore? Well, here's something we hadn't considered: Prisons....

Packers Bong Guy Keeps Putting Lotion In The Basket
You may remember the not-at-all-creepy fellow who celebrated Brett Favre's 420th touchdown in the only appropriate fashion. Well, he has a new hit video, in honor of the Packers' shellacking of the Vikings last week....

Your Night Out With Brady Quinn
What could be a more attractive way to spend early 2008 that a Dance Revolution Party with Brady Quinn? You could have that chance!...

The Texans Bring You Deep Inside The Game
Say what you will about the Houston Texans organization, but they know how to sell their Web site. As End Zone Buzz discovered, the official Texans cheerleader page has some, uh, interesting Web innovations....

During The Lambeau Leap, Watch Your Nuts
You know, it was inevitable that this would happen at some point: During a Lambeau Leap, some fan grabbed wide receiver Ruvell Martin's crotch. That's just over the top....

Bill Belichick Is A Surly Dick
Michael Showalter is one of the minds behind The State and Stella and the writer and star of the films Wet Hot American Summer and The Baxter. We're a fan. He also, apparently, is a sports fan. To promote his new album Sandwiches And Cats, he's doing a pseudo tour of the various lousy blogs like our...

This Week In The SSW
For years — OK, a couple of days — Slate writer Robert Weintraub has been tinkering with a concept called The SSW, short for "The Sean Salisbury Wisdom," which tracks the consensus of the football punditocracy to ensure those triumphant declarations from Friday aren't flushed down the memory hole on...

Somebody Put The 49ers Out Of Their Misery
It seems kind of crazy, in retrospect, that anyone could have thought the 49ers were going to make some sort of leap this year. (Some idiots even picked them to win the division.) The biggest disappointment is that Mike Nolan is now looking so damned sharp for no good reason. What happened to these ...

The Dullest MNF Game Of Them All
It's not easy to come up with reasons to get excited about tonight's Monday Night Football game between the Seattle Seahawks and the San Francisco 49ers. We've been trying....

A Productive Way To Expend Your Rooting Energy
Dan Steinberg of DC Sports Bog waded into the morass that is the scene outside a Redskins-Eagles game ... and somehow lived to tell the tale....

Dick Nolan, Rest In Peace
Before Ronnie Lott and Joe Montana and Jerry Rice, there was a plucky band of guys in shiny gold pants with names like John Brodie, Gene Washington and Cedrick Hardman. Many don't remember that it wasn't Bill Walsh who put the San Francisco 49ers on the map; it was Dick Nolan. He was the first coach...

We Suspect The Pats Have Videotape Of The Incident
How do you know the Patriots are having a breakthrough, historic, crossover season? It's not just that they're undefeated; they now have their own crazy stalker lady....

The NFC Is Delicious And Nutritional
The Mighty MJD's Smorgasbord runs every Monday. Do enjoy....

The Gripping Ravens Quarterback Controversy
Say what you will about how bad Steve McNair has been this year … but it sure beats Kyle Boller. For Ravens fans, we can't imagine how depressing this sideline cutaway must be....

It's Vinatieri's Turn To Be The Lonesome Kicker
Tidbits and info smidgens from Week 10 in the NFL ......

Past, Present And Future Football Action
Brett Favre joined Dan Marino as the only quarterbacks in NFL history to throw for 60,000 yards during the Packers' 34-0 shellacking of the Vikings today. (Yes! I started the GB defense this week!) Adrian Peterson injured his knee thanks to an Al Harris helmet shot, but Jesus eventually rose and mad...

Budweiser's Right: The Browns Are So Good They Don't Even Need A Logo
Gus Johnson, calling that exhilarating Bills-Fins game today, just got done saying before the half that he thinks the Steelers are being slept on and that they could easily hang with the Patriots or Colts. DA says, "Suck on my Horse Balls, Gussy!" Browns 21, Steelers 9...