um Page 243 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Madison Bumgarner Had An Endless, Awkward Staredown With Umpire Joe West
You know Joe West. Of course you know Joe West, because West is the only MLB umpire who thinks you’re there to see him instead of the game. Picking fights, escalating confrontations, offering opinions when none are asked for, and ejecting West craves being the center of attention, and wants nothing ...

The Raiders Are Less Metal Than We Thought, Will Paint Gold Marks On Field
Dammit, Chris! You lied to us Chris!...

Entire Umpiring Crew Forgets What The Count Is
Home plate umpire Ted Barrett lost track of the count on Astros outfielder Preston Tucker as he faced Angels pitcher Nick Tropeano in the second inning of today’s game. Tucker had a full count, but after Tropeano threw ball four, nothing happened. Houston manager A.J. Hinch had to challenge the play...

Here Is Some Impossibly Stupid NBA Ass-Eating Gossip To Brighten Your Day
Sometimes, you just need to go to MediaTakeOut, a website that employs some of the finest prose stylists (seriously) of our time, and read an anonymous Instagram model’s account of how she ate NBA BALLER WHOSE NAME STARTS WITH A K’S butt, even though it was MUSTY....

Raiders Give Middle Finger To The NFL, Refuse To Put Gold Marks On Field
As part of the celebrations for the 50th Super Bowl later this season, every NFL field has the ‘50’ painted gold, like the above photo from the Steelers’ stadium. Every NFL team, that is, except for the Raiders, who played on a field absent of gold in Weeks 1 and 2. ...

Auburn Fan Tammy Goes Back On The Finebaum Show, Gets Mad As Hell
Auburn got stomped by LSU last weekend, which means it was time for notorious Auburn superfan Tammy to call into Paul Finebaum’s show and let off a little steam. ...

Donald Trump: Joe Flacco Is Elite
Pestilent clownfister Donald Trump did a video Q&A today, and two of the 12 questions he answered were about the NFL. The first and most important was on the eliteness of one Joe Flacco:...

How To Clean Semen Off Of Anything
We’re kicking off Season Two of the official Ask a Clean Person podcast in what I consider to be perfect style: covered in semen. My guest this week is Maureen O’Connor, sex columnist for New York Magazine and a contributor to The Cut, who joined me to talk about cum stains. ...

Jason Pierre-Paul Vs. The Giants Will Only Get Uglier From Here
Okay, we’ve seen the stump. Now back to the part where Jason Pierre-Paul is still a top-tier free agent with a $14.8 million contract tender to sign, and he and the Giants are going to mats about when he’ll be back....

Lance Lynn Sucks, Is Unreasonably Angry About It
Cardinals pitcher Lance Lynn lasted 3.1 innings in today’s start against the Cubs, giving up four hits, six walks, and three earned runs before being replaced by Tyler Lyons. Lynn threw 46 strikes in 83 pitches, and decided home plate umpire Dan Bellino shared part of the blame for his poor outing....

The Texans Will Finally Ditch Their Death-Trap Grass
Houston’s NRG Stadium has turf unlike anywhere else in the NFL: it is natural grass, that, when not in use, is sliced up into 8’x 8’ trays and taken out of the dome to get some sunlight. It has been by all accounts the NFL’s worst playing surface, with the lawyer of one former players suing over a c...

<i>Black Mass </i>Plays Like A Boston-Mob-Thriller Parody
1. Whatever your thoughts on The Departed or The Town—the modern Boston mob/crime thrillers that all modern Boston mob/crime thrillers are measured against—it is undeniable that everyone involved was deeply invested in both. Matt Damon had been waiting his whole life to play a character like his Dep...

Welcome To Deadspin's Republican Debate Liveblog
Tonight’s Republican presidential debate takes place at the Ronald Reagan Library, where the top 11 candidates will discuss foreign policy, domestic issues, and probably Ahmed Mohamed, the Muslim teenager who was arrested for bringing his homemade clock to school earlier this week. Loony-toon Donald...

Tom Brady Says It "Would Be Great" If Donald Trump Becomes President
Tom Brady has had a Donald Trump hat in his locker for about a week now, sitting there on that shelf like a wearable fart. Someone in today’s media scrum asked Brady about the hat ahead of tonight’s GOP debate, leading the Patriots quarterback to toss around the idea of President Donald Trump....

How To Answer The Phone
Your phone rings. It isn’t one of the two people you talk to regularly, but also doesn’t appear to be a bill collector. And you, you’ve been answering the phone the same way since you were 12. Get yourself together. ...

Fabio Aru Beats Tom Dumoulin To Win Vuelta a España
Tom Dumoulin was never supposed to be this close, and yet, for 19 stages, he was. The Vuelta a España is a cruel race full of steep ascents. The guys who win this race trend lighter and less well-rounded than Tour de France winners, simply because the parcours are a sadistic climbing party with few ...

BYU Wins Again Thanks To Fourth Down Desperation Pass
Last week, BYU’s Tanner Mangum hurled a hail mary to beat Nebraska. Tonight, he did it again—connecting with Mitchell Juergens in the end zone on fourth down to defeat the 20th-ranked Boise State Broncos....

Memphis Undoes Decision To Honor John Calipari After Fans Whine
Kentucky basketball coach John Calipari will be inducted into the Basketball Hall of Fame this weekend for a career that has, over nearly 30 years, seen his teams advance to six Final Fours (two of them vacated) and win an NCAA title. Before Calipari coached Kentucky, however, he spent nine seasons ...