up Page 703 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Mike Shanahan Has A Poopy Face
Your morning roundup for Nov. 7, the day we learned why Europe is just better than America sometimes. Photo via D.C. Sports Bog. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Eli Manning Beats Tom Brady, Will Still Not Be Considered Elite: Your Sunday NFL Roundup
For whatever reason, Eli will always be considered just an "OK" quarterback. Maybe it's because he is a contemporary of some very, very good quarterbacks—one of whom is his big brother—or maybe it's because he is kind of a doofus. Either way, here's your Sunday roundup. Enjoy....
LSU-Alabama Was The Worst Game Ever
Your morning roundup for November 6, the day we learned how to make our own sea salt. Image via Mocksession. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
This Guy Was So Jacked Up For USC-Colorado He Decided To Get A Wacky Haircut
Your morning roundup for November 5, the day we learned lobsters have no feelings. Image via Mocksession. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
A Sampling Of Comments ESPN.com Has Not Deleted On Stories That Have Nothing To Do With OccupyTebow
We're all still warm from the glow of the uprising that sent ESPN.com's commenter police into retreat—a remarkable, joyful march that continues unimpeded even as this is being typed. At the same time, we couldn't help but think of those comments ESPN's moderators have allowed to remain attached to ...
How Many Times Have We Farted In Human History? A Very Rough Calculation
I was sitting next to my friend on a bus the other day. He farted. It got us thinking: How many farts have there been in human history?...
Cockblocked By Rugby!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
The Stupid Moral Panic Over Mocking Tim Tebow; Or, What Would Jesus Do About Tebowing?
Oh, please. You know why Tebow memes exist? You know why they've, let us say, gone forth and multiplied? Because of columns like this, that's why. Here's the headline:...
Peyton Hillis Can't Get On The Field And He Sure As Hell Can't Sweet-Talk The Ladies
Peyton Hillis on his marriage last week: "I've always been a guy on the down-low about things. I try to get things done that I want to get done. It was something I really wanted to get done." [The Plain Dealer] [H/T Israel M.]...
The Spinning Magic Of Left-Footed Punters
Why did the Saints, Chargers, and Ravens—three teams with above-average punters—all work out free agent punters last week? No, it's not because any of those teams is scapegoating their punter for the whole team's jaw-dropping inconsistency. Rather, they wanted to practice against left-footed punters...
The Official Who Breaks Up A Hockey Fight Will Sometimes Get Punched In the Face. Twice.
Your morning roundup for Nov. 4, the day we finally had it up to here with hugging. Video of hockey fight via Cosby Sweaters; H/T to Alicia. For an excellent GIF of Cal Clutterbuck's punch, be sure to check out West Coast Digress. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
The Facial Expression On The World's Fastest Jump Roper Is Gold
[via The Score]...
Candy Thief Gets Absolutely Trucked While Running From Cops
Via local news connoisseur Jimmy Traina comes this breaking post-Halloween news out of Phoenix. A group of young men had been stealing candy from grocery stores to the tune of hundreds of dollars, until police pulled them over. One man ran, hiding on the rooftops. Then: pepper spray, a slippery ca...
CNN Cuts Short Its Awkward Interview With John Carlos Because Of Technical Difficulties
Former Olympian and current human rights crusader John Carlos has a new book out with The Nation's Dave Zirin, which we excerpted last week. Carlos has been lending his support to the Occupy Wall Street movement, and this morning, CNN booked him for an interview with Kyra Phillips. The conversatio...
Kevin Durant Is The New Redskins Quarterback...On A Trading Card
Kevin Durant's dominating performance at an intramural flag football game at Oklahoma State earlier this week has a lot of people asking "What if?" All of those people work for the Panini Group, the Italian collectibles giant that makes trading cards and bought Donruss two years ago. What if Durant ...
OccupyTebow Enters Day Four; ESPN.com Admits Defeat
The sit-in at ESPN.com continues unmolested, as the overworked mods have apparently ceded the comment section to mob rule. Meanwhile, people who should know better still don't realize this has long stopped being an attack on Tebow himself, or even draconian comment moderation on a site that's more t...
A Seattle Sounders Fan Salutes You, Two Fingers At A Time
Your morning roundup for Nov. 3, the day we learned you're never to old to be a male prostitute. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
This Is What Happens When ESPN.com Attempts To Fight Back
At some point this evening, the ESPN comment moderators lost their minds and decided to attempt to deal with the Greater Than Tebow meme that's been raging on a Bill Williamson post for the past three days. But instead of simply disabling comments, the site has burdened some poor intern with the t...
This Is What ESPN.com Under Attack Looks Like
The #occupytebow comment feed over on ESPN's now-regrettable post, "Time for Elway to think post-Tebow," is still going after three days. If anything, it's only gotten more spirited. You can watch in real time on the post, but we also went ahead and captured a bit of the glory for those of you who...
ESPN.com Moderators Launching Tet Offensive Against "X > Tebow" Right Now
Go to the Tebow column's comments, and make sure you've got it set to "live." You can see the poor mods deleting every single "X > Tebow" comment in real time. They've worked their way back to yesterday, but still have a day and a half more to go....