up Page 726 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Here's The Video Where LeBron James Takes Flopping To Heretofore Unseen Levels
Your morning roundup for May 27, the day it helps to have a background in mathematics if you want to work for Pauly Shore. Video H/T Allen W...

More Bad Madness On The Sepp Blatter Campaign Trail
A week before FIFA's presidential elections, another evil-smelling troll has escaped from the basement of Sepp Blatter's Swiss chalet. The current source of horror: Mohamed bin Hammam, Blatter's rival in the elections, was charged yesterday with offering bribes to members of the Caribbean Football U...

Phillies Infielder Throws 10-Pitch 19th Inning To Close Out Joey Votto And The Reds
Your morning roundup for May 26, the day after Disney realized that it probably wasn't the best of ideas to trademark American heroes for profit....

Your Bruins/Lightning Game Six Open Thread
So, Boston heads into the St. Pete Times Forum with an opportunity to advance past the Lightning and into the team's first Stanley Cup Finals appearance since 1990....

The Kim Kardashian Effect: Advanced Stats Show Why Kris Humphries Put A Ring On It
Nets forward Kris Humphries put up great numbers in the seventh season of his NBA career, his first as Kim Kardashian's beau. The couple announced their engagement (with a disturbing description of an "intimate family celebration" involving horses), and while there are no shortage of possible motive...

Revisiting The Great LeBron James Cocksucker Debate
here's a decent chance that at some point in the past 24 hours — perhaps when he did a little shimmy on the floor after drawing a late offensive foul, or when he began yapping demonstratively at the Less Than Zero extras in the stands, or when he passive-aggressively referred to Derrick Rose as "MVP...

If You Have Front-Row Seats At An Indians-Sox Game, What Else Are You Going To Do But Shotgun Beers?
Your morning roundup for May 25, the day we were "spoon-fed gold leaf and pharmaceutical cocaine by Ferran Adria himself." Image courtesy tipster Rosina....

The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book
The new ESPN oral history, Those Guys Have all the Fun, is now available in stores. We've been having some fun with the book in recent days. Mixed in with our usual sober analysis of satellite transponder rights and ESPN's dual-revenue-stream model, we've also brought you many tales of ESPN people s...

The Dead Wrestler Of The Week Archive
Brian "Crush" Adams (1964-2007): He played so many archetypes of '90s wrestling mythology that he became legendary at none, moving from persona to persona without fully leaving the last behind. No mention of his previous lives was made. He was a man without a history, unstuck in time. READ »...

Why Coaches Rarely Show Players How They Really Feel
Your morning roundup for May 24, the day we masturbated in Row 18 on the flight to Denver. Photo of Tottenham's Harry Redknapp's motivational techniques from the Guardian's year in soccer photos. H/t Michael T....

Cash-Filled Envelopes And Other Peculiars From Sepp Blatter's Reelection Campaign
It's hard to keep track of the political gyrations at FIFA these days, especially with president and Swiss money-eel Sepp Blatter running for reelection. Corruption charges have been flying since former FA head and England's 2018 World Cup campaign chairman Lord Triesman told the British Parliament ...

UPDATE: Oddibe McDowell's Water Bill Is $116.80 This Month, But He Has A Credit
Via Broward County Water and Wastewater Services....

The Ryan Giggs Affair Reaches An Apotheosis Of Stupidity
Remember how everybody knows Ryan Giggs had an affair with Imogen Thomas, but they couldn't say it because of the dreaded Super Injunction? So, yeah, that Super Injunction is still in place today, but that isn't stopping every single English newspaper from sticking his name and mug all over their ...

Half-Marathon Finisher Gets Caught Cheating, Is A Dog
Here's Dozer the Goldendoodle crossing the finish line of the Maryland Half Marathon last week. Already he's become something of a local legend, with media interviewing his owner and volunteers pledging thousands of dollars in donations on his official runner page. But something's not right. Look ...

Today In Bothering The NFL With Stupid Questions: Ray Lewis One-Man Crime Wave Edition
Yesterday, Ray Lewis made some eye-opening comments about the lockout. "Watch how much evil, which we call crime," he told Sal Paolantonio, "watch how much crime picks up, if you take away our game."...

Goal Celebration Goes Horribly Awry With A Commemorative Sliding Kick To The Face
In a match against Sun Hei in the Hong Kong FA Cup about a week ago, a South China player tried to share a goal celebration with his teammate, and instead broke his nose. Yet another reason that everyone should just stick to the Bernie....

There Was A Poignant, Action Figure-Only Funeral For The Macho Man In A Backyard This Weekend
Your morning roundup for May 23, the day Beyoncé ran the world. Staged Macho Man funeral via HuggingHaroldReynolds.com....

Your Canucks/Sharks Game Four Open Thread
If San Jose fans actually believe that men in tights can be as effectively distracting to a penalty-boxed opponent as bared boobs, they don't deserve to advance to the Stanley Cup Finals....

Watch ESPN's Doris Burke Flub Her Lines About Oklahoma City Arena
Your morning roundup for May 22, the day some people in North Carolina started taking Pirates of the Caribbean too literally, but not in a cool swashbuckling way or anything....

Giants Fans, Don't Insult The Butt Of Your Best Homegrown Player Since Marvin Benard
Your morning roundup for May 21, the day we robbed the Knights of Columbus and a tattoo parlor. H/T E. Gunther for the screencap....