up Page 729 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

By The Looks Of Things, The Texas Rangers Mascot Is Hung Like The Palomino Horse It Purports To Be
Your morning roundup for May 7, the first Saturday after the gays seized control of Atlantic City....

The Week In Deadspin
A selection of stories from the week we converted to "journalism plus."...

Great Moments In Bad Handjobs
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Figure Skating Is Much More Tolerable When Routines Are Super Mario-Themed
Here's Tatiana Volosozhar and partner Maxim Trankov doing their graceful skating thing at the 2011 World Championships in Moscow earlier in the week. No Beethoven. No Handel. No terrible 70s ballads. Just Mario....

Wild Australian Horse Decides To Run Away From A Steeplechase Course And Over The Crowd
Your morning roundup for May 6, the day Willie Mays becomes an octogenarian....

Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread
The Nashville Predators will attempt to even the series with the Vancouver Canucks at two games each tonight. On the plus side, it's a home game. On the minus side, Vancouver still has the lead singer of Loverboy in its corner....

A Special Graduation Message To The Class of 2011
Every year, thousands of young Americans graduate from college. And every year, those poor wretched hungover bastards are forced to sit out in some quad in million-degree heat to listen to a mildly famous person yammer on and on for hours about how these kids will change the world and all that bulls...

Presenting The 18-Minute Video Of Shin-Soo Choo's Failed Roadside Sobriety Test
Your morning roundup for May 5, the day a former vice president wants you to thank "enhanced interrogation" for the current president's visit to Ground Zero....

Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread
With a home victory tonight against the Flyers, the Boston Bruins would have an insurmountable lead in their conference-semifinal series. With a home loss against the Sharks, the Detroit Red Wings would have an impossibly deep deficit from which to emerge in the other conference....

New Yorkers: Come Watch A Live Sports Magazine, Since None Of You Are Buying The Paper Ones
Pop-Up Magazine, "the world's first live magazine," is hosting its first-ever sports issue and its first-ever Manhattan issue at the Skirball Center on May 11 in partnership with ESPN The Mag. Katie Bakes will be reading, along with a lot of other smart people, and also Jay Bilas. It will be the kin...

Danny Ainge Is Horrified By What He Sees
Your morning roundup for May 4, the day we again discovered Xanadu in Jersey....

Watch This Manny Pacquiao Puppet Sing A Sweet Ballad
Unless you have Showtime or are a boxing fan, you probably haven't noticed much buildup for the Manny Pacquiao vs. Shane Mosley fight this weekend. That probably has something to do with the fact that Shane Mosley is not Floyd Mayweather Jr. or a Mexican. Luckily, some dude has been playing around...

One Nation, Under Jimmer
Your morning roundup for May 3, the day certain Canadians declared they're moving to Greenland....

College Students Celebrate Bin Laden's Death With Patriotic Backflips, Nudity, Beer: A Gallery
In celebration of the fact that Osama bin Laden was announced dead last night, American college students everywhere took it upon themselves to riot in the streets, drunkenly yell their college rally chants on national television, and light couches on fire. Oh, America....

And Now A Picture Of The Worst Custom Heat Jersey Ever Made
In honor of the Heat/Celtics series, this guy has made a video of how to wash your car and clean your ceiling fan with a Paul Pierce jersey. And he did it all while wearing this obnoxious custom-made Big Three jersey....

If MLB Pulls This Video, They Hate America
Your morning roundup for May 2, the day Fox News kept being wrong....

Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread
Both the San Jose Sharks and Tampa Bay Lightning attempt to take two-game leads in their respective playoff series. For the Sharks, that'd mean holding rink against the Detroit Red Wings. For the Lightning, that'd mean heading south only needing to win two of three home games against the Washington...

Here's Video Of A V8 Supercar Bursting Into Flames
At the V8 Supercars Championships on Barbagallo Raceway near Perth, Australia, Karl Reindler's No. 21 Fair Dinkum Sheds Racing ride stalled and was then hit by Steve Owen's VIP Petfoods car. Then came the remarkable explosion....

Before Returning To Lockout Mode, Every NFL Franchise Decided Against Drafting A Bone-Cancer Survivor
Your morning roundup for May 1, the day after Seth Meyers said Weekend Update stuff to people's faces....

Here's Video Of A Greek Soccer Match That Involved Riot Police And Hoses
That AEK defeated Atromitos 3-0 to win the Greek Cup Final to claim its first trophy since 2002 is good for them. That fans threw flares at one another during the national anthem, goals resulted in "pitch invasions" and the faithful turned the VIP section into a target-rich environment is good for...