up Page 801 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Don't Ask Marian Hossa For Stock Market Advice
The dogpile on Marian Hossa has been sufficient and thorough. The Wings beat Hossa's Penguins last year. Then the Penguins beat Hossa's Red Wings. Goat cheese....
Only Minimal Arrests? For Shame, Pittsburgh
"We have a few arrests. For the most part people are being orderly but we've got a few people who don't want to leave." C'mon, Pittsburgh. That's no way to usher in a Crosby regime. [Post-Gazette]...
Ladies, Meet The Splash 'Stache
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Depressed Urban Zone Saved By Valiant Sports Team
All of Pittsburgh's troubles as a shrunken post-war manufacturing center are over now that the city has its third Stanley Cup championship and its second major sports title this year. Detroit, sadly, will be boarded up and shipped to Borneo....
Although This Type Of Scene Is Likely Not To Occur At The Deadspin Meetup, Please Do Drop By
No, I'm assuming there won't be any impromptu jello wrestling matches or any females present besides those being dragged out by their significant others or friends-of-friends of Gawker media. This doesn't mean you still can't stop by for free beer....
NHL Season Just Might End Tonight
Here we are. Game 7. Should I spend the next few paragraphs trying to regurgitate as many clichés as I can about the finality of the ultimate do-or-die scenario or just show you a picture of Greg Ostertag on skates?...
Awesome Boyfriend Ties Kids Up In Garage So He Can Enjoy The Game In Peace
Dilemma: You want to see the big game, but your girlfriend wants you to babysit. You could listen to the game on radio—or you could tie the kids up, leave them in the garage, and hit the bar....
Watch Your Step, Boobsy
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Nicklas Lidstrom's Busted Ballsack And Other Tales Of NHL Woe
If Detroit captain Nicklas Lidstrom looked a little sluggish at times during this Stanley Cup Finals, he has a very, very, very good excuse. He suffered a "nearly catastrophic" testicle injury in the Conference Finals. Now how do you feel?...
Evgeni Malkin Is Here To Steal Your Girlfriend (Updated Update)
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NHL Did Not Rig The Stanley Cup Finals
Conspiracy theorists are apoplectic after learning that Red Wings' 2009 Stanley Cup Championship gear is already available for sale on the NHL website, but the cooler heads at Puck Daddy have already proven that the Penguins got the same treatment....
And This Is What Shows Up In Your Inbox The Day After You Do A Post About Transexual Filipino Basketball
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Please Do Not Leave Your House During Game Six
So here we are again ... one year after Pittsburgh lost a tough Game 6 clincher at home to Detroit, we're right back where we started. Only you have to watch tonight's version on your home TV, you ingrates....
These Ladies Were Actually 35-Years-Old At The Start Of Sunday's Padres/Diamondbacks Game
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This Is Why You Can't Have Two Horses Named After A Bird Run In The Belmont
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Maybe This Is What Threw Off Brad Lidge Last Night
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And Now, My Michael Jordan Impression
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Red Wings Show Their Age, Penguins Show Them The Door
For the first time in the Stanley Cup Finals, the Red Wings looked sad and old, while the younger, vitamin-eating Penguins skated circles around them to even the series. And none of us stayed up to watch "The Tonight Show."...
One Smirk At A Press Conference Is Worth A 1,000 Box Scores
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What Are You Watching Tonight?
Game 4 (pivotal!) of the Stanley Cup Finals is tonight. So is Game 1 (crucial!) of the NBA Finals. Which one is more important to you and/or your bookie?...