v Page 2836 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

They Don't Make Alien-Punching Movies Like They Used To. <em>John Carter</em>, Reviewed.
1. I know that the main reason John Carter exists right now is because the technology is available to produce it, that you can have armies of CGI characters that don't look ridiculous, that you can invent sprawling vistas of Mars desert, that you can have spaceships crash into spaceships crash into ...

Marlins President Calls Miamians Stupid, Jose Reyes Greedy
If you know anything about the sweetheart deal the city gave the Marlins to build a new stadium, you know team president David Samson basically bent Miami over a pinball machine and had his way with it. But he's far from done with the humiliation—with his remarks to a gathering of local business lea...

Dave Duerson Had Less Than $20,000 In Assets When He Committed Suicide
Dave Duerson was a millionaire and a successful CEO after the conclusion of his 11-year NFL career. But when he shot himself in the heart last year, leaving behind a note that asked his family to donate his brain for dementia testing, Duerson was going through bankruptcy proceedings. He owed hundred...

FLOTUS On Board: One Reader's Boldest Experience
Ring the bells—the winner of the "My Boldest Experience" essay contest has been chosen. Behold, a tale of cargo vans and khaki pants by Deadspin reader Cameron B., who is just won a $100 AMEX card. Read and be inspired....

Dancing Canucks Kid Is Sexy And He Knows It
Even less concerned with the judgment of strangers? The guy behind him, drinking his Mike's Hard Lemonade. [via Hot Clicks]...

Jakub Voracek Used To Have Cognitive Abilities, Until Niklas Kronwall Exploded Him
Philadelphia's Jakub Voracek skated directly into a Kronwall, which, from the point of view of physics, isn't much different from skating into a brick wall. Voracek was clearly out for a few seconds, going directly into the always-terrifying the fencing response. No penalty was called on the play,...

Usain Bolt Vs. Prince Harry In The 25-Meter: Who Ya Got?
If you picked the one wearing the Jamaica shirt—you'd be right, actually, despite his gingerness. It's just good form to let royalty win. Even Princess Diana's riding instructor used to let her be on top every once in a while....

Ronald McDonald Loved Seeing Bryce Drew, But The Ole Miss Fan Sitting Next To Him Just Grimaced The Whole Game
I don't have the context for this, and I don't want it. Clowns get damn good seats for being as scary as they are, and if you don't know why Ole Miss still hates Bryce Drew, take a trip down memory lane back to 1998....

South Dakota State Is Going Dancing
Congratulations to the South Dakota State Jackrabbits, who in beating Western Illinois 52-50 in overtime won the Summit League tournament and punched their ticket to the dance. [ESPN2]...

Detroit Is Going Dancing
Congratulations to the Detroit Titans, who in beating Valparaiso 68-50 won the Horizon League tournament and punched their ticket to the dance. [ESPN]...

Western Kentucky Is Going Dancing
Congratulations to the Western Kentucky Hilltoppers, who in beating North Texas 74-70 won the Sun Belt Conference tournament and punched their ticket to the dance. This is the same WKU that lost to a team playing six players then fired its coach for it. [ESPN2]...

So This Is What It Looks Like When Russian Prostitutes Fight In The Street
It is a sad day for all of humanity when трех проституток cannot resolve their grievances via non-violent means. As such, last week — or whenever this was filmed — cracked open a sad day for all of humanity....

Cubs Win! Cubs Win (A Video Game-Induced, Alternate Universe World Series)!
Sony's new ad campaign for MLB 12 The Show hinges on the tagline, "So real, it's unreal." Apparently, that includes the Chicago Cubs winning the World Series, thanks to some Michael Bay-worthy special effects....

Deron Williams Knows His 57-Point Game Was Less Impressive Than Rajon Rondo's Triple-Double
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Rondo's 18-20-17 is the ultimate point guard game....

Davey Johnson Has Nicknamed Drew Storen "Tinkerbell"
Johnson, the Nationals' manager, picked the name because Storen, the team's closer, has a tendency to tweak his delivery. All well and good. And plenty of swell options for entry music....

Is It OK For A Movie Trailer To Lie? Or, Why <em>Friends With Kids</em> Is Definitely Not <em>Bridesmaids 2</em>
Last October, a Detroit woman named Sarah Deming filed suit against FilmDistrict for its misleading advertisements for the film Drive. Her claim was that the film's trailers had led her to believe the film was about driving rather than, you know, Ryan Gosling stomping in the orbital bones of various...

ESPN's Keith Law Is A Fan Of Bad Spring Training Twitpics, Unless It Involves One Of His Bad Spring Training Twitpics
We told you two weeks ago about the hilarity that is Bad Spring Training Twitpics, the site that's collecting all the bad art being snapped by the cameraphones of the many baseball writers now roaming around spring training. That same day, Keith Law let his many Twitter followers know he was also a ...

Ronda Rousey Mangles Arms And Mean Mugs With The Best Of Them
If you only watched the main event of the Strikeforce event on Saturday, you would have seen judo Olympian Ronda Rousey turn Meisha Tate's arm into a bucatini noodle. But you might have missed Rousey scare the bejeezus out of Showtime host Heidi Androl before the fight. Look at that death stare. C...

Unconscious Soccer Player Gets Red Card For Diving
Diving is a serious problem in soccer, yes? One referee is fighting the good fight, no matter how many critically injured players he has to send off....

Rory McIlroy Celebrated Being The World's No. 1 Golfer By Playing Tennis Against Maria Sharapova
Newly crowned world's top golfer Rory McIlroy—fresh off his win at the Honda Classic—joined a star-studded gallery at the BNP Paribas Showdown at Madison Square Garden last night to watch girlfriend Caroline Wozniacki lose in straight sets to Maria Sharapova 6-3, 6-4. ...