v Page 3091 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Anyone Want A Photo Of David Aardsma's Penis?
The Mariners closer has allegedly taken a nude photo of himself and sent it to someone via cell phone, and now one enterprising individual wants to find it a suitable home....
CRACK BABY VS. AIDS BABY? An Audio Funbag With Adam Carolla
Worlds are colliding, folks. Number one podcaster in the universe Adam Carolla was nice enough to record an audio funbag with us, in which he answers some of your most probing questions....
Welcome To Deadspin's "Comedy Week"
This week, Deadspin will celebrate the release of Sarah Silverman's book, "The Bedwetter," with an excerpt and a friendly chat with you weirdos. To commemorate this fine event, we've also brought in more funny people....
BYU's Top Rusher Withdraws, Possibly Due To Premarital Sex With Girlfriend
Harvey Unga, BYU's leading rusher, is withdrawing from school. So is his girlfriend, basketball player Keilani Moeaki. They're leaving because of a violation of BYU's notoriously strict honor code. Let's speculate!...
Get Ready For The Worst Sports Show Ever
A helpful reader was trolling Craigslist when he stumbled across a casting call for a new sports/talk/comedy show. And man, does it sound terrible (and not just because Joumana Kidd is hosting)....
Apropos Of Nothing, Here's Phillies Vomit Kid Doing Madonna Karaoke
Mean-spirited? Yeah, a little. Only tangentially related to sports? Sure. But fuck it. Here's Matthew Clemmens (stage name: Pukemon) with "Material Girl."...
Night On Ubaldo Mountain
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Robert Lee Will Sell You A Mobile Home, Terrify You
What does saying "a bouncer in Birmingham hit me in the face with a crescent wrench five times" have to do with selling mobile homes? Not a thing, but I'll be damned if Robert Lee isn't a great pitchman. [YouTube]...
Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread
Will Bulls-Cavs be half as good as Bulls-Celtics? Will the Atlanta Hawks learn to "Fear the Deer?" Can the Celtics shake off some half-season rust and stop Los Heat? Will the Nuggets rally in the name of their ailing coach?...
Stories That Don't Suck, With Special Guest Host
Today, our pal Alex Belth, proprietor of Bronx Banter, is taking the reins. He's selected four stories for your enjoyment....
ESPN.com Editors Can't Appreciate A Good Manly Kiss
It's not so much that the image on the front page of Soccernet is Gary Neville warmly congratulating Paul Scholes on his game-winner. It's more that the original filename was "nevillegay" (since been changed to "nevillekiss"). [ESPN.com]...
A Blow-By-Blow Account Of The Vomiting Phillies Fan
In our #tips section, we received a purported firsthand account from someone sitting in the same section as Matthew Clemens, the New Jersey man accused of throwing up on an 11-year-old girl. We reprint it here for your reading pleasure....
99 Problems, Of Which Brand Infringement Is One
Jay-Z, owner of the 40/40 Club chain, is suing slugger David Ortiz for allegedly swiping the 40/40 name for his own club in the Dominican Republic, called "Forty Forty," an apparent reference to a baseball achievement no one associates with David Ortiz....
Commish Gives Salary Cap A Boost
David Stern has lifted the salary cap for next season to $56.1 million, roughly $4 million higher than expected. Great news for the Knicks, who can now afford Carlos Boozer, Ray Allen, and nice crutches for the both of them. [TrueHoop]...
Victor Conte Leaks "Sugar" Shane Mosley PED Admission
Mosley is suing Conte because he claims he didn't know what was in those injections he was getting from BALCO. That's a little harder to believe after Conte blew up his spot by releasing video of Mosley's deposition....
Jerry Jones Clarifies His "Social Moment," Explains That Bill Parcells Is, In Fact, Worth A Shit
Jerry Jones took the opportunity at a diabetes fundraiser yesterday to explain away his sodden musings on Bill Parcells, and somehow he came away sounding a lot sillier than he did last week during cocktail hour at Ocean Prime....
Last Night's Winner: Not This Guy
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Unlike this Phillies fan, who on Wednesday at Citizens Bank Park allegedly jammed his fingers down his throat and vomited on an 11-year-old girl and her father....
Spandex-Wearing Men Humiliate Defenseman, Selves
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
It's Professional Naked Lady Bobblehead Night
The Las Vegas 51s gave away bobbleheads of Holly Madison, the number one gal in Hugh Hefner's harem. A bobblehead? I can't masturbate to that. [Rick Chandler]...
<i>Chicago Tribune</i> Writer Sits On Fighting Bulls Scoop, <i>Sun-Times</i> Has No Problem With That
TNT's Craig Sager reported that Chicago Tribune writer K.C. Johnson knew about the John Paxson-Vinny Del Negro dustup weeks ago, but kept quiet "out of respect" for the coach. Obviously, this makes Craig Sager an unprincipled hack....